Over the years I have accumulated a lot of knowledge on dating, hooking up, booty calling etc. And somewhat relationships. But all the other shit, I got it down. And through all that, the good, the bad, the ugly, my accomplishments and mistakes have given me a lot of tools to use. I call them my “dating arsenal”. There are a lot of tools in my dating arsenal. I’ve blogged about my stacked Bullpen. And my MIRACLES method. But they are just a part of my arsenal. My arsenal also includes my spots around Boston (places that I go to and know inside & out); Good sports games tickets (always impressive on women who never make it to games); Where I live in town (a great place near a bunch of hot spots and Fenway Park is my backyard); and Who I know (connections that get me what I need on dates including but not limited to nice tables, bottles, skipping lines etc.). I also have my style: How I dress; How I act; How I talk; How I look. Also what I do for a living. How I do it. Why I do it. My personality. My sense of humor. My charm. All these things are a part of my dating arsenal. Every guy has one. It’s what helps us get through dating! Helps us meet quality women. Helps us filter out the shit. Helps us get sex. And all these weapons in my dating arsenal I put into use when I get to the “T’s 3 Step Dating Process”.
What the hell is “T’s 3 Step Dating Process”? Glad you asked! The 3 Step Process occurs after the first meeting of a woman. Sometimes after a few casual meet ups for drinks. A few fun times out. The process is for dating. Not for banging! I’m talking when I want to date a woman I like. Who actually likes me back. Who I have respect for. A genuine interest beyond just sex. Get it? And these dates are real dates. Never day dates. Day dates/lunches/drinks are for friends, family, work contacts. You’re a man. You have balls. Use them. All dates should take place at night! The process should only occur Thursday through Sunday. Trust me. It lets her know you like her and you are taking her seriously.
Ok. So now you know about the tools. The first meeting has already taken place. The interest is there. And at this point it’s about more than sex. All this leads up to the 3 Step Process.
Step 1. The Qualifier (Date 1):
We already know each other a little. We both have interest. An attraction. I asked her out on a real date and she accepted. This first date needs to be very casual. Light. A light meal. I really know about the place we are having the date at. The menu. The atmosphere. The history. The staff. It must have good lighting so we can see each other. Look into each other’s eyes. See each other smile. That’s why movies suck for a first date. Always pulling a few things out of the arsenal. Shoot one of my Bullpen chicks a text with any questions when she’s in the bathroom for a female’s point of view when needed. This date should also be very fun. Lots of asking questions and really caring about her answers. After a fun night, bring her home and send her on her way with a kiss on the cheek. A little long hug. Done. Send a follow up text. Hope she wants another date.
Step 2. The Interest Insurer (Date 2):
If The Qualifier went well for both of us then it’s onto the Interest Insurer. Which is basically finding out if every connection and interest from The Qualifier is still there while still learning more about each other. Hey, like I said, it’s a process. This date should include a nice meal. A conversation that builds on all those career, friends, family, likes, dislikes and life ambitions that were learned about in the first date. More eye contact. Get a little closer. More easy touching. Now remember, you’re only doing all this shit if this stuff is happening naturally! Yeah I know it sounds too planned and detailed but you can’t plan attraction and interest. This is an outline. The real shit happens when two people like each other. Don’t force it. If what you had in date one isn’t here, then end the night early. Be honest. But if it’s going well then keep it spontaneous. After the meal it’s time for a romantic walk and talk! I’ll put my arm around her. Her reaction to this says a lot. Our conversation alone as we stroll through the Boston Commons or Boylston and Newbury streets is key. This filters her out even more. This also filters me out for her. This night, if it goes well, should let us both know how we are starting to feel and what we’re thinking. A kiss is key. Her lips are the final telltale. Only kiss chicks you like bro.
Step 3. The Closer (Date 3):
Few get here. Seriously. My interest and lifestyle barely allow me to get past the Interest Insurer. Hey, that’s just the way my life goes sometimes. That’s why I’m good at the hooking up and not so much on real relationships. But I’m improving! Also, I’m still looking for better quality women. You read this right? Anyways, if we get through the first 2 steps/dates then that means it’s time for The Closer! At this point, she knows what’s up. I know what’s up. We’re interested. We’re attracted. We’re liking. We’re dating. We’re horny! Bust out the fancy restaurant. Bottles of wine. Maybe champagne. She’s in a dress. I’m suited up. Less talking here. Our bodies are doing a lot of talking for us. How we look. How we smile. How we sound. How we breathe. How we eat. How we drink. You know the deal people! After dinner, a separate place for dessert. Most likely Finale. Share a piece of chocolate cake and 2 glasses of port to wash it down. Sitting close. Hand is touching the bare leg. A couple of dirty cute questions. Feeding each other. Reaching in for long kisses. Time to go. CHECK PLEASE! Back to my place. Quick 7 second tour. Possibly some Jodeci on the surround sound. If I even make it there. Because now we’re all over each other. To the bedroom. CLOSED.
I just disclosed my dating arsenal. But trust me, you’re own should work for you. If you need to change yours up then swap out some of my tips and techniques. Remember, this is for dating a woman you honestly like. Not for dating a drunk slut at the club. I’m using my dating arsenal more and more the older and smarter I get. Which I like. I hope this was helpful, if not, I don’t give a shit. It works for me.
Until next time. Always take it there.