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Doesn’t feel write… not a typo

It’s 10:45PM. BOSTON time. Monday, January 30th 2017.

I have the next 9 T-pisodes written. They were all queued up and ready to go. 342-350. I have debated all weekend on whether or not to push the button and post today but I couldn’t do it.

I started T-blawg to give my take on the world. Entertain and share through my point of view. I have always written here through my voice. The same way I would speak to my closest friend. And I don’t want to take T-blawg down the road where everyone else seems to be going. Myself included. Everyone is heated. Everyone has opinions. Everyone is taking a side. I refuse to do that here. I also feel that I can’t post my usual stuff while the world is going crazy off of here.

I’m putting the pause button on T-blawg. At least for the next few weeks. I don’t think things will go back to normal in the world but I plan to get T-blawg back to normal. Or I may just put those queued up T-pisodes further on hold and address the world as we currently know it.

I’ll be back soon.

 

Go Patriots.

Go America.

Be good.

Be better.

-T

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T-pisode 341: Grown Men Reunion

There’s no better perspective than the one you get from being around friends who knew you then and still know you now.

There’s no better perspective than the one you get from being around friends who knew you then and still know you now.

 

If someone had asked me when I was a kid if I thought I would live to see 18, odds are I would have given a different answer depending on the mood I was in. Part of me would think that I would make one big enough stupid mistake to cost me my life. Another part of me used to think that somehow someway living in that apartment in East Boston with my father would all end badly. And then there was that big part that made me say to the world “FUCK YOU. I’m getting the fuck out of here and making it big one day because I’m smart as fuck.” Luckily I listened to that last part.

Last Patriots season my buddy and I were able to get two more tickets along with our own season tickets to bring our closest buds to the game with us. This was the first time the four of us had been together since my cousin’s wedding eleven years earlier. We were mainly a crew of 9 kids whose ages only varied by 4 years that saw each other in one form or another almost everyday during our teens and early twenties. My cousin and I were like brothers since birth but the other 7 Eastie kids were our crew. A bunch of punk kids with good hearts, big balls, bad mouths, shitty attitudes and shit ton of smarts both street & book would be the best way to describe us. We didn’t kill anyone like some of the other kids from Eastie but plenty of people wanted to kill each of us at some point. You best believe that. Over the years it was tough for all of us to stay in touch but the 4 of us always did somehow. That day was a reunion for the record books. Because we were grown men now. On the ride down to Gillette as we thumped OUR hip hop music and called each other by OUR nicknames, we reminisced about all the crazy shit we did together as kids and couldn’t stop wondering how we weren’t dead or locked up. We did talk about all the kids no longer with us who died since high school graduation. Between all our graduation classes we counted at least 40 kids who we knew that were now dead. It was sad. It was fucked up. But that was Eastie life and fortunately that was the only sad part that day. The rest of that day was full of straight fucking joy man. I remember everything about every Patriots game I have ever been to and I swear…I remember NOTHING about the game that day. All I remember is the laughing, reminiscing, fun, stories, drinks, jokes, Cuban cigars and craziness that the 4 of us shared that day. It was us again. One more time. Except we were older, wiser and happy to be alive.

The crazy Eastie kids had grown up. That day boys, cousins, brothers, husbands, dads, college graduates, world travelers, NFL players, Hollywood writers, corporate America businessmen, homeowners, success stories and all around good grown men got together and had a blast. WE became everything everyone expected us not to become. My buddy put it best on the walk over to the stadium that day. He said “My face hurts from smiling so much.” He was right. All our faces hurt from smiling so much that day. And you can bet your ass the Eastie kids in us smiled too.

 

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 340: No Lie

Imagine being so honest in a world that is so ass backwards at times. That’s me. That’s T.

Imagine being so honest in a world that is so ass backwards at times. That’s me. That’s T.

 

I don’t know how many lies I told my first eleven years on this planet but I know I was just 11 years old when I promised myself that I would never lie again. Not to anyone. Not to myself. That was the age when my father first made up a story about why he had to borrow money from me. Yes, a grown man had to lie to his only son to borrow money to gamble. It was the first time he asked me to borrow money with a lie but certainly would not be the last time. That’s when I knew I would never tell a lie. No matter what.

You would think going through life without lying and being as true to your word as possible would make things slightly easier for yourself than the lives of those who lied. Not true. And that’s no lie. See what I did there? Being “too” honest has a down side. Sometimes when you are so honest some people think that everything you say is a lie. It’s like they think “No way this guy is this honest. He has to be lying.” I notice this in two major areas in my life. The workplace and dating. At work people love to say things that they think others want to hear. Especially those who have a direct impact on their careers and those who can elevate their careers. I’m the exact opposite. While some people I have come across in my career consider me to be genuine because of my honesty, others have downright despised me because I spoke my mind. And when it comes to dating you’d be surprised to find out how many women who have been lied to by so many guys in their lives and honestly believe every new guy is also a liar. That every guy has a hidden agenda. Every compliment, every nice date, every gift, every time you look in their eyes and tell them how you honestly feel about them is a lie to them. It’s both crazy and disheartening. The majority of my friends and family however love and respect me for being so truthful. For saying the things they don’t want to hear but knowing that they still have to hear it. Sometimes though, even they get pissed at me for being so honest. But that’s me.

George Washington once said “I cannot tell a lie.” Tony Montana said “I always tell the truth…even when I lie.” And Jay-Z said “Numbers don’t lie, check the scoreboard.” I can’t stand liars. I can’t tell a lie to impress a woman. And I certainly won’t ever lie to someone to get something from them that I didn’t earn honestly. That’s me. I sometimes joke with people who don’t know my nickname and see that big “T” tatted on my shoulder for the first time and ask what it stands for. I simply reply… “Truth.”

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 339: T’s Keys To Success

I got the geese! Geese! Geese! I got the geese! Geese! Geese! Get it??? LOLzzzzz.

I got the geese! Geese! Geese! I got the geese! Geese! Geese! Get it??? LOLzzzzz.

 

I have written about success on here a lot over the years. My story has been written from the angle of what it has taken to get me where I am today and the need to keep pushing further. T-blawg is a digital recording of my life and blueprint for those who need help making plans of their own. On this Monday night I am sharing what I think are the keys to success and can be applied to any aspect in life.

 

Never waver
Never. Once you know what you want in life… Once you know what you need in life… Once you know who you are and who you want to become… Never waver. Stick to your guns no matter what. People will question you. People will doubt you. People will never understand where you come from or where you’re going. And they don’t have to. Only you do. Never waver.

 

Believe in yourself and all that you are…
Know that you can overcome any and all obstacles. Know that you can fall flat on your face. Know that it is ok to doubt yourself. As long as you get back up. You have to believe that nothing can stop you. Don’t ever let that belief die.

 

Be not afraid of greatness…
The key to being great is knowing that you are great. That is a confident statement not a cocky statement. Wanting to be great and wanting greatness in life is nothing to feel guilty about. There is a lot of average and a lot of content people in this world. I’m telling you it is ok to want greatness. Be great. Do great things. Achieve your greatness in whatever that may be!

 

Know how to deal with rejection
Life is full of rejection. People will reject you. The world will reject you. I have saved every rejection letter from Hollywood. I remember every rejection in my life. And I use it all here. I use it all to keep me going. I turn rejection into motivation and THAT is one of the biggest keys to success.

 

Be ready for loneliness
Success is a lonely road. It is. The long hours. The late nights. The climb up the mountain. It’s one lonely road. Writing is a very lonely process. I like to work out alone. I’m constantly lost with my thoughts and emotions alone. But that is the price to pay for success. Sure you are around people who love and support you and no it’s not healthy to always be alone. Enjoy company but the most successful people will tell you success is achieved by you and only you. Believe it.

 

You will NEVER sleep
“I ain’t been asleep since 96” says Jay-Z in the song below. This is true. Like most successful people I try to get my solid 8 in every night but it NEVER happens. Successful people don’t have enough hours in the day to do what they need to get done. To do lists and organization are also keys but successful people keep moving. Because they are always doing something and always have the need to do more. My body may want to rest in bed at night but my mind has a difficult time getting to sleep. If you want to be successful say goodbye to sleep.

 

YOU define yourself, no one else
Unsuccessful people will do everything they can to project their own failures, insecurities, shortcomings and ideas of what normal and successful are on to you. They have a picture in their heads of how it should be and will do everything they can to paint you into that picture. Successful people don’t let other people define them. They turn off all that noise and define themselves.

 

Respect money
If you want to be successful then you have to respect money and to respect money you have to understand money. How to make it. How to invest it. How to grow it. How to spend it. And know when to talk about it and whom to trust when you talk about it. Understand about debt to income ratio. Know the difference between good debt and bad debt. A major key to success is having respect for money.

 

Accept that people close to you WILL secretly hate on you
This a damn fact. There is that saying “Pay close attention to those who don’t clap when you win.” Big or small, a friend is happy for you when you make a victory. Once you start hitting victory after victory you will start to see your circle diminish. And that’s ok. Let them go. Successful people surround themselves with a good support system. You build each other up. You cheer each other on. That’s how success works.

 

Your mind, body & soul have to be fit and on the same page
If your mind, body and soul aren’t clicking then you will NEVER be successful. Eat clean. Work out dirty. Feed your soul. Nourish your mind. Keep yourself healthy and happy no matter how busy you get. No matter how hard you have to work. When one of the three isn’t on the same success page as the others then you will fall off the road to success. Trust me on this. Take care of yourself because no one else will. Not when it comes to being successful.

 

 

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 338: T Reviews “Patriots Day”

I think a sunset shot of the American flag atop the Landmark Center in my Boston neighborhood of Fenway where I saw the movie makes for a pretty good featured pic in this review and the first T-pisode of 2017!

I think a sunset shot of the American flag atop the Landmark Center in my Boston neighborhood of Fenway where I saw the movie makes for a pretty good featured pic in this review and the first T-pisode of 2017!

 

As soon as the Boston Marathon tragedies happened I knew there would be movies about it. I remember having a conversation with my cousin about how I wanted to reach out to the organizers of the One Fund Boston and look into possible Kickstarter options about raising money to make a movie one day with ALL proceeds going to the victims and families affected by that day. I wanted to use whatever “Boston-Hollywood” connections I had to see what we could make happen. Then I got mad it myself for even thinking about it. Sure my intentions were good but it was just…too…soon. Then I heard about the books being written. And how some of them were being optioned into movies. One of the projects I heard about was a movie called “Patriots Day” that would be produced by and star Mark Wahlberg.

Over the holidays I went to see “Patriots Day.” I managed to put aside my feelings, my love for Boston, my hurt and memories from that day and put the screenwriter in me in that theater seat. That lasted for about 5 minutes and then all the emotions kicked in. Mostly anger and disgust. I know Wahlberg claimed that he wanted to make a tasteful and respectful movie. He failed at that. I’ll craft the rest of my words here directed at Mark Wahlberg and not the actors who portrayed some of the victims onscreen. Out of respect. To be tasteful. However, this review is necessary. Mark Wahlberg’s “Patriots Day” is not. Was it too soon? Absolutely. Was it respectful? Tasteful? I couldn’t tell because as someone who was there that day, as someone who has partaken in the Marathon Monday/Patriots Day tradition I was too distracted by Mark Wahlberg’s giant head and ego. What do I mean? Mark Wahlberg managed to put his fictional character in every “key” scene. Every “key” scene being a very real scene from all the events that unfolded that day and week. He was at the finish line when the bombs went off. He was saving lives on the blood covered sidewalk on Boylston St. He went from hospital door to hospital door interviewing victims. Hell, THAT was even his idea in the movie. He was at the warehouse going through the videotapes of all the businesses on Boylston St. looking to place the killers. He was driving around in circles in different cities when he heard about the police officer shooting at MIT over the radio. He was at the gas station doing the questioning after the carjacking. He was a Boston cop at the shootout in the city of Watertown. He was the first cop to find the younger killer in the boat. Hell, he was even in the walkway to the dugout and went up to David Ortiz before he came out at Fenway to give his now historic “This is our fucking city!” speech. Mark Wahlberg managed to make the movie about himself while ensuring that every other bit player Boston character was the stereotypical slow-witted, heavy accented, wise ass, blue collared, loser Bostonian. This movie wasn’t about THAT day. This movie wasn’t about the victims. This movie wasn’t about one of the darkest days in Boston and American history. This movie wasn’t about how hate drives terrorism to cause hurt and kill innocents by deforming religion. No. This movie was all about Mark Wahlberg and he is a piece of shit for making it. This movie did not need to be made. Not now. Not like this. Not with him.

Supposedly Marky Mark wanted to make the first movie about that day because he made himself Boston’s Hollywood ambassador. Mark, you haven’t lived here in over 25 years. You’re not as Boston as you like to tell people you are. Opening Wahlburgers doesn’t count for shit either. I’ll take Tasty Burger over your shit any day of the week by the way. You should be ashamed of yourself for getting this movie made. You should take your entire pay from that movie and split it among all the survivors who now have lifelong medical bills. From one man who also comes from a tough Boston neighborhood… Who also has faced hardships… Who also wears his Sox hat proudly… Who loves movies probably even more than you… Who has made Patriots Day a part of an annual tradition for 20 years… You fucked up. Plain and simple. Stick to making swearing teddy bear movies when it comes to Boston. You insulted “your” city and ABSOLUTELY disrespected every single person whose life was changed that day. So on behalf of my entire city, please turn in your long expired Boston card.

 

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 337: More & Less Of In 2017

No looking back from here. Only forward.

No looking back from here. Only forward.

It’s the holidays and 2016 is coming to an end while 2017 is about to begin. I’m closing the book on this year and everyone and everything that did not add to my health, happiness and success this past year. I’m reaching a milestone birthday in 2017 and I only need positivity and healthy support going forward. My advice to myself and to all of you is this… In 2017 do less of the things that didn’t work. Do less worrying. Spend less to no time with the people who did nothing for you except make you stressed or unhappy. Stay away from people who tend to just stay still and try to deflect that same approach on to you because they don’t want you to move forward in life. And do more of everything that makes you happy, healthy and successful. It’s simple really.

In 2017, the book will be finished. My career will continue to flourish. My health in the mental, physical and emotional aspects of my mind, body & soul will continue to be a priority. I’ll only focus on my strong existing relationships and look forward to exciting possible new ones. I plan to be even more focused on myself and on those that make me happy. I’m looking forward to starting my fourth decade of straight fucking dominance and I’m not looking back. Nah son! Year 7 of T-blawg has been written. On to Year 8…

Happy holidays! All the best in 2017!!!

 

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 336: Festivus 8

A Festivus meme that mashes up two of my all time favorite shows??? Best…Festivus…EVER.

A Festivus meme that mashes up two of my all time favorite shows??? Best…Festivus…EVER.

 

Festivus. My favorite holiday of them all! It was created by the father of a writer on “Seinfeld” and made popular on the show years ago and I along with hundreds of other people (“Seinfeld” fans, Wikipedia users) have been celebrating it ever since. It happens on December 23. Two days before Christmas. Its tagline is “Festivus for the rest of us.” Its purpose is to have a holiday for the people who refuse to get caught up in the insanity of the other holidays during this time of the year. And its traditions are unmatched.

What are the traditions of Festivus? Well there is the “Festivus Pole” instead of a tree. A plain pole without any decoration. There are the “Feats of Strength” where the party isn’t over until the head of the household is pinned to the ground. There are “Festivus Miracles.” Like a politically inexperienced, orange skinned, sexist, racist motherfucker who says stupid shit like bigly, Jina and yuuugggeeee becoming President of the United States of America! And then there is my favorite tradition of them all. The “Airing of Grievances!” This is the part where you get to tell everybody how they have disappointed you over the past year.

Here are my “Airing of Grievances” from 2009-2015:

Festivus 7. Festivus 6. Festivus 5. Festivus 4Festivus 3. Festivus 2. Festivus 1.

Now it’s time for this year’s grievances. 2016 was a shitty year for everybody big picture wise, let’s not bullshit. But on a personal level it was a pretty damn good year for me and I set myself up for an even bigger & better 2017! Buuuut I still found some shit to grieve about as I usually do. Classic T style of course. I present Festivus 8!!! AKA “F8” like the now shitty “Fast & Furious” movies that will never fucking end. LOLz.

 

Air France
Let me tell you all this… Getting stuck in Paris in real life is nothing like the movies! After spending 3 hours doing French fucking airplane donuts on the tarmac without any real update about why we weren’t taking off we then had to de-board from the back of the plane, down makeshift stairs, on to a bus back to the terminal where I then proceeded to threaten to murder the useless & rude Air France staff because they wouldn’t book me a flight back home. Instead I had to spend the night in a shitty airport hotel and got home a day later than planned to catch up on a shit ton of work. Shitty way to end a great vacation. Fuck Air France.

Millennials
I’ve been hard on this group in 2016. Guess what? I am not going to ease up on you in 2017 until you all start stepping the fuck up, dropping the entitlement bullshit and start acting more like normal human beings. Also, please work more on yo social skills not yo social media skills in 2017. Thaaanks.

America
Yeah…America. Go back and read my last 5 T-pisodes to see why I’m pissed off at the country. I mean you voted in Donald Trump! Are you all high?! Well now in Boston you must be. That shit be legal now yo. I’m talking about weed.

2016 Boston Red Sox
You failed David Ortiz in his last season and did not make my prediction come true from last year’s Festivus that you would win the World Series. Assholes. I’m so disappointed in you people.

More Deflategate Bullshit
I cannot fucking believe Tom Brady ended up serving that witch hunt bullshit suspension. But here’s a new prediction… New England Patriots STILL win the fucking Super Bowl, bitches.

“Pokemon Go” People
I think this thing finally died down but when it hit over the summer all you grown ass adults who chased around invisible Japanese cartoon characters better not have kids. Ever. Odds are you all probably don’t get any sex anyway. But still. You people are scary as fuck.

Social Media Rap Battles
Tupac and Biggie died from their rap battles in the 90s. Today? Rappers tweet & post insults on Instagram. Through their smartphone keyboards and apps. That’s how they battle in 2016. I have never wanted Big & Pac to come back from the dead to shoot all these so-called rappers more than I do right now.

Banshee’s Final Season
Besides the very last episode this final season was absolute dog shit. After the final season of “Sons of Anarchy” I wasn’t ready for another good show turned bad in its final season. I almost died from this disappointment. Seriously you guys.

Waste My Time 2016
It seems even I was a victim of this saying in 2016. I had my time wasted and I wasted the time of someone or two. Oh well. Guess we’re heading into “I’m Still Successful And Rich AF But You Exactly Where I Left Yo Ass In 2016, 2017” LOLzzzz!

Everybody is fucking dead
Like everyone died in 2016. Holy shit. 2016 was a murdering motherfucker for 12 months, no? Where the police at???

Dudes that wear tight black jeans with holes in the knees
The fuck is this fashion trend? It’s so stupid. Cut the shit. Weirdos.

The Election
FUCK YOU.

All of social media basically becoming one app
Everything feels like one live…same…stupid fucking story now on every app you open, right? This is the start of the social media fall. Calling it right now. The bubble is ‘bout to burst.

Harambe Overkill
When this first happened I actually felt bad about Harambe getting shot to death. Then every unoriginal douchebag on social media drove the Harambe thing quickly into the ground. And it’s still going. I hate nothing more than unoriginal fucks who keep retreading unoriginal played out material. Dicks out for Harambe? Nah son, I hope yo dick falls off in general.

Open front cleavage string tied shirt blouse thingies
I don’t know what these shits are called but they turn T on and are very distracting. God bless.

The T-blawg Book
It’s still coming. That’s what she said…again.

Mannequin Challenge
I actually liked the Running Man Challenge even though it wasn’t actually the Running Man. Because it made you do something. But the Mannequin Challenge? Just standing still and shit? Yeah, no, you all look like straight fucking idiots.

Kanye West
Speaking of idiots… YOU are definitely the second biggest douchebag of 2016. I will NEVER support your music ever again. Your ego and useless hoe wife done fucked your brain up. You lose. You get nothing. Good day sir.

 

And there you have it. My annual airing of grievances and the longest running tradition in T-blawg history. Hopefully Trump doesn’t cause WWIII killing us all before I get to write “Festivus 9” next year! I’m kidding. Not really. Happy Festivus!

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 335: Let’s Make America T Again! Part 5

Unlike the other pics in the T-pisodes from this series, this one is not from my visit to Washington D.C. Instead it is from my second home, Gillette Stadium. Home of the greatest football team to ever play the damn game!!!

Unlike the other pics in the T-pisodes from this series, this one is not from my visit to Washington D.C. Instead it is from my second home, Gillette Stadium. Home of the greatest football team to ever play the damn game!!!

 

What is a leader? Here is my definition of what a leader is… A leader is someone who both inspires others and commands so much respect from them that they choose to follow him or her. A leader is someone who is honest. Someone who fights for what he or she believes in and someone who fights for those who cannot fight for themselves. A leader is classy. Intelligent. Honest. Well spoken. A leader does not waver. He stays true to himself and true to those that follow him. A leader has strong morals and great character. So what the FUCK happened to all our great leaders in this country?

Somehow we have gone from great leaders like John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King who have guided the people…led the people…fought for the people…bled for the people and died for what they believed in to sub par politicians and wannabe reality show celebrities trying to make themselves “important”…richer and more famous instead of being leaders. This is terrible. This is embarrassing. This is sad. I want my President of the United States to fucking inspire me. To make me proud! To make me feel safe. All our politicians should be leaders. They should look to be the voice of those who cannot speak for themselves. They have that power but should not be punch-drunk off that power. My President should not be arguing on fucking Twitter. My President should not be the joke of several memes. Picture JFK tweeting nonsensical bullshit or being the brunt of late night talk show hosts’ jokes and opening monologues. I voted for Obama…twice. The first time he inspired me. I felt that he received a lot of opposition his first term and then I gave him 4 more years to make something happen. Anything. But he did not. Obama was not a good President. He tried. He tried to be a politician. He did not try to be a leader. I voted for Hillary because I think that Donald Trump is neither a politician nor a leader. That’s for damn sure. But now he is going to be my President so I have to give him his chance because the majority of America voted him in. And that’s how it works…for now. It sucks yes, but let’s face it…Hillary was NOT going to be our savior. She was just the lesser of two evils and it sucks even more saying that. Our presidential candidates should be such strong and inspiring candidates…leaders…that it is so difficult for us to choose from but instead we are just voting for the one who we think “won’t fuck things up as bad as the other.” Because we DO NOT have any true leaders today to choose from…to vote for…to lead us. We do not have a JFK. We do not have a MLK. But that doesn’t mean that there are not any true leaders out there. I’m sure there is. This is America. We were founded by and built by great fucking leaders. They exist. They just need to step up. To give the people hope. To make us believe…again.

These last 5 T-pisodes were MY take on the state of things in this country and in this world inspired by both the presidential election and recent events. I had a lot to say, as I usually do. And I came here to unleash my thoughts out into the world, as I usually do. I hope I made a few of you think. Laugh. Feel. I hope I captured some of your voices. I hope someone, somewhere maybe learned something. And if you need a leader…I’m here. Fuck it, I’ll run in 2020 and you can bet your ass I have what it takes to make things happen. You all know my story. You all know what I’m capable of.

Next week I get back to usual T-blawg shit! It’s that time of the year again people. It’s time for the longest running T-blawg tradition. It’s time once again for Festivus!!! And I got some grievances and they SHALL BE AIRED.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 334: Let’s Make America T Again! Part 4

I really wanted to get closer to the Washington Monument to take a bunch of pics but the woman I was with at the time got very upset over walking around and doing touristy things on vacations so you just have to enjoy this single one. I am so sorry but now you know how I felt. LOLz.

I really wanted to get closer to the Washington Monument to take a bunch of pics but the woman I was with then got very upset over walking around and doing touristy things on vacations so you just have to enjoy this single one. I am so sorry but now you know how I felt. LOLz.

 

As a kid, I hardly left my neighborhood of East Boston. Besides bringing groceries to my grandmother in the neighboring city of Everett with my mother or visiting my father in Walpole or Concord prison, I didn’t leave Boston. Like, at all. As a family we did like two long weekends in Lake George, New York. Then my mother saved enough money to take the two of us to Disney World when I was 12. That was my first time on an airplane. Then I did a spring break trip to Montreal in college and finally got on a plane again to visit a friend in Los Angeles when I was 22. I finally started to travel all over this great country and all over the world once I graduated from college and entered and excelled in corporate America; wrote & pitched scripts to Hollywood and started to make real “grown up” money and started tatting up my passport and the passports of random women and those of family members.

Reread that first paragraph again and try telling me I’m not one of a kind. Or an underdog that made it. Or someone who broke the stereotypes others placed on him. Try telling me I’m not someone who made the environment my own product instead of being a product of my own environment. I know what WIC is. I know exactly what food stamps can buy. I know how embarrassing it feels to use a “free lunch” card at school to eat. I have worn winter coats that my mother got off layaway. I know all too well what it’s like for families to live off of “unemployment checks” and “worker’s compensation” payments. I know what it’s like not having health insurance and having to go to the local clinic for reduced or free healthcare. See…my life has given me one hell of a FUCKING perspective. From growing up in a tiny bubble to circling this giant globe today…I get it. I fucking get it. My life at times has been both a lesson and a blessing but I know it makes me different. It makes me understand how everything works. It makes me want to make things better. A lot of people today don’t have that perspective. And most certainly a lot of politicians don’t either. Too many people just don’t get it. How do we perceive ourselves in the United States? How do we perceive each other? How does the rest of the world perceive us? Inner city neighborhoods need help. The poor will always need help. We need police. We need good police. We need jobs. We need good jobs. We need strong relationships with the rest of the world. We need trust. We need religion. We need churches. We need to be healthy. We need good healthcare. We need peace. We need perspective.

Do we have the right people in the White House and in our government offices that actually have this kind of perspective? Do they get it? Do YOU get it? You didn’t have to grow up in a fucked up neighborhood and then nurture this unstoppable want to succeed from within like I did to have perspective. But it’s time for us to have these discussions. It’s time for the people who do get it to share their perspectives with others. It’s time for some real fucking leaders in this country. And next week I close this all out with just that!

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 333: Let’s Make America T Again! Part 3

Whether it’s Obama or Trump, one of them should invite me over soon for a Patriots game and I’ll drop mad knowledge on their ass over some whiskey & gingers and some good football watching. Just saying.

Whether it’s Obama or Trump, one of them should invite me over soon for a Patriots game and I’ll drop mad knowledge on their ass over some whiskey & gingers and some good football watching. Just saying.

 

I’m using this T-pisode in the series to air out some beefs… First, yes it has been very clear for a few presidential elections now that the electoral vote over the popular vote is outdated as all holy fuck. It isn’t the year 1804 anymore and YES it is time to make a change to the Twelfth Amendment of the United States Constitution. Second, we need more options than the two major political parties. Yes, I know there are other major parties than the Republicans & Democrats and a shit ton of minor parties, but let’s face it, it always comes down to these two parties and that needs to change. Because both the Republicans & Democrats can’t get their heads out of their own asses or each other’s asses anymore to bring the change this country needs over the needs of their own party’s need to win. Am I wrong? No, I am not.

Finally, I need to light up ALL three of the so-called “generational” groups living, eating, working, fucking, complaining, protesting, succeeding, failing AND voting in my country. The Baby Boomers, Generation-X and the Millennials. Now I’m going to go at all the people in these groups who have embraced the stereotypes given to them. Because my parents are definitely Baby Boomers. I am technically on that Gen-X/Millennial cusp but I relate more to the morals and work ethic of the Gen-Xers and I somewhat relate to the education & tech levels of the Millennials. Baby Boomers used to be known as a group who rejected traditional values. Now? They can’t think past their own personal views on anything. They live in their own “one view” world and their outdated time has come. They are being phased out & aged out and that is good for all of us. That is good for the U.S. It is needed. Sorry, Ma! To my Gen-X peers, most of you who were rebellious bad asses & brooding youths growing up on the 80s & 90s have now become soft and helped create a generation of even softer children who love to whine all day. You think parenting is giving your kid an iPad to babysit themselves while catching up on your DVR all night and making several Whole Foods runs each weekend then throwing the kids in the car to drive down to Disney once a year is the “ideal” modern family. Seriously? You do work hard. You do make money. I’ll give you all that. But somewhere along the line most of you have lost your way. You need to find that inner bad-ass teenager from the 90s that made you rebel against the norm back then and challenge “the system” again before it’s too late! OR ELSE you may be a Millennial. Ah yes, the Millennials. The “we want to work as little as possible but get paid the most and like to think we work hard but really don’t because all we do is fuck around on social media all day and think ‘hooking up’ in between Netflix seasons is what a normal relationship is in 2016” generation. Oh…and if we disagree with anyone or anything we’ll passive aggressively send off one hell of an ambiguous text, tweet or email in “protest” on our way to Starbucks! Right? That’s sad. The Millennials are some of the most intelligent and passionate people I know but your laziness is fucking things up more than you know. You have no direction. No goals. You ALL need to put more heart, blood, sweat and tears into your lives and into everything you love or else YOUR future and MY future are both fucked.

Here’s what I just said people… We all need more options. We all need to have more “skin” in the game. We all need to be more passionate about everything that makes this country progress on every level. We all need to be more active upfront and not after the fact. We can’t wait for someone to come along and magically change things overnight so we’re all working, making money, have nice homes and living life IN love with our favorite fucking celebrity spitting out these genius future generation babies!!! Are you nuts?! That would be SO cool though but that’s not going to happen. We all need to start making a difference. I know I just burst many of your bubbles. Including my own. But it had to be said. We all know what the problem(s) is/are. Someone just had to point your sensitive puppy nose in the shit on the rug like I just did! Now let’s all start making things better. Who is WITH me???

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 332: Let’s Make America T Again! Part 2

Honest Abe? Honest T? Honesty. See what I did there? Oh yeah you did. Read below for some real honest shit. You’ve been warned.

Honest Abe? Honest T? Honesty. See what I did there? Oh yeah you did. Read below for some real honest shit. You’ve been warned.

 

First things first… This country has done gone soft. Everyone is SO damn sensitive. Everyone likes to complain about their favorite TV show killing off their favorite character… About how bread and everything fucking gluten is bad for you… Everyone wants to ”protest” every little thing they don’t agree with… Tweet their feelings out across the world… Share memes that they “can totally relate to” because some stranger threw some weak R&B song lyrics on a pic… Yeah, I fucking said it. You can’t say shit about shit without someone disagreeing with you because they are a keyboard tough guy on the internet but a lil’ bitch in person who won’t say shit in real life because they fear a punch to the mouth. But then again…too many people are doing just that…punching each other in the mouth. And doing way worse than that to each other. Wait, what?

While there is that half of America that is oversensitive there is also that other half that just isn’t sensitive enough. It’s almost 2017 and let’s face it people, we’re still very fucking racist. Very fucking sexist. Very fucking insensitive. While a large chunk of the population can give it but can’t take it there is that other part that just doesn’t care at all. In a world that is so quick to throw around phrases like “White Privilege” and “#BlackLivesMatter” and “Did you just assume my gender?” and call everyone that isn’t “your” religion a “terrorist” or say that every religion you don’t understand is “ISIS” makes no sense at all you ignorant and stupid bastards. Ignorance is bliss, shall I go on? Oh yes, I shall. How are you going to say that some police officers aren’t racist? How are you going to say that every cop is racist and takes to the street with the intent to kill instead of the intent to protect & serve? That just because you believe in one God and someone else believes in another God or no God at all that you are right and they are wrong? Just because you don’t understand how a man born with a penis identifies himself and relates more to women than men doesn’t mean that person is less of a person than you. Do you know what the real problem is here? Education. That’s right. Both text-book and common sense in life. A big chunk of this country’s population refuses to learn about anything different from their own skin color…their own religion…their own sexuality…their own neighborhood…their own household…their own family…their own political party’s beliefs. That’s right. I’ve written on here before about “the world you know” where you are mostly concerned about what is only happening to you. About what is right in front of you. About your own little world. It doesn’t make someone a bad person necessarily but it does stop you from seeing the rest of the world. From having an understanding about something that isn’t your “normal” but may be normal for someone else. WE need to get better at educating ourselves. WE need to get better at offering better teachers, better books, better schools, better opportunities. WE need to stop being oversensitive about the dumb little shit that means next to nothing and start becoming more sensitive to the big picture things that actually impact all of us or else we’re fucked as a country. We’re fucked as ONE country. As ONE People. As ONE world.

I think we need to be more honest with each other. I think we need leaders who aren’t afraid to say what I just put into words. I think we need more people in our government buildings in positions of power with large balls and strong vaginas. Whether they were born with them or had doctors make them for them. I really do. Speak honestly and lead I say. Somehow with this presidential election it became one big embarrassing reality show. One big real life unfunny fucking meme. We did this to ourselves. Yes we did. And now we need to fix it. The next four years we’re either going to point fingers at each other, at the White House, at people we don’t fully understand or consider normal and fuck ourselves even more OR we’re going to finally step up and make the changes that need to be made. For us all.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 331: Let’s Make America T Again! Part 1

This is the only pic I have of the Capitol building from my visit to D.C. a couple years back. Please pretend the crane setting up the stage isn’t there and be like “Yo, T took a mad Jon Blaze shot of the Capitol son!” Ok? Thaaanks.

This is the only pic I have of the Capitol building from my visit to D.C. a couple of years back. Please pretend the crane setting up the stage isn’t there and be like “Yo, T took a mad Jon Blaze shot of the Capitol son!” Ok? Thaaanks.

 

I was going to start my five-part “A Man’s Life” T-pisode series this week where I write about the happenings, difficulties, successes and philosophies that come out of a man’s life from his childhood to teens to twenties to thirties and an outlook even beyond that. But instead, I am going to do something I have never done here before. I am going to break one of my most sacred T-blawg rules. I am finally going to get political. T style of course. That’s right. With the recent Presidential election, it’s results and the current state of the world I am going to go off on politics!

Not only did I get inspired to finally write about politics, I was inspired to write five T-pisodes about politics! Das right. Why? Back in July I was pissed and I unleashed this T-pisode into the world. Over the last four months since then I have watched this circus of a Presidential election…I have watched how embarrassed I felt with these two candidates…I have watched people on social media throw nonsense and bullshit and hate all over the damn place…and I just felt…ENOUGH. Enough. I can get very political off of this site. Sure I share funny status updates and silly memes on my personal social media and through texts with my closest friends. But I do like to have political conversations with a select few whom I think are intelligent, open-minded friends. I do enjoy it. What I don’t enjoy is all the bullshit we have gone through as citizens of this great country. As someone who is self-made. As a man who has traveled the world. As someone who has daily access and a great understanding how the world’s markets, politics, religions and economies work. It’s time to take a side of my personal life off of this site and get it into T-blawg style writing. And over the course of the next five Mondays, this one included, you will CLEARLY see how I feel and what I think REALLY needs to be addressed and fixed in the United States of America.

I’m going to do what I usually do as well. I am going to entertain you all while making you laugh, think and feel. That has always been my goal every Monday the last seven years. But make no mistake about it these political T-pisodes will be unlike the other 330 T-pisodes written thus far. I’m coming for the assholes, the racists, the easily offended, those who like to offend, the sexists, the bigots, the liars, the hypocrites, the Millennials, the Gen-Xers, the Baby Boomers, the Democrats, the Republicans, the uneducated, the highly educated, the rich, the poor, the foreign, the domestic, Obama, Hillary and Trump. T is coming for you all. And I’m about to fuck all your shit up! Get ready…

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 330: T Does London & Paris in 3 Paragraphs…AGAIN

The first international T-blawg “repeat” Pose in T-blawg history. And I’m extremely fucking proud of that.

The first international T-blawg “repeat” Pose in T-blawg history. And I’m extremely fucking proud of that.

 

*I’ve decided to do a series of T-pisodes that capture my travels throughout my life. In three paragraphs. I’ll post them every once in a while. Some places I’ve been to a few times, others only once. And some I will probably never go back to because of what went down there.

 

I’m at the point in my life now where I’m making good on some serious promises to my family. I always told them when I was younger “When I make it big, you’re all coming with me.” “Making it big” was a silly thing said by a young Eastie kid who didn’t know shit about shit back then but the idea behind it was basically to do whatever I could so my family also enjoyed a bit of the good life I worked so hard for. One of those perks is traveling the world. Not talking about my day job sending me to Europe. I’m talking about traveling the world on my own dollars and sense. See what I did there? So, this past summer I took my niece to both London and Paris and my mother came along as well because she enjoyed herself in Italy that much three years ago and was willing to put up with my ass on vacation one more time!

I had been to London twice before for work but never on vacation and my only trip to Paris wasn’t as best as it could have been four years ago so I wanted another crack at both cities. My niece didn’t ask to go to Europe and that is why I took her. Because she never asks for anything and it was her turn in the family line up to get a free vacation on me! London is still by far my favorite city in the world only second to Boston. I love going there for both work and vacation. We did the touristy stuff I’ve done before but for the first time I took them on a river cruise down the Thames and really learned a lot about London in ways even I didn’t know before. And my mother got to see where Princess Diana got married and where she gave birth to both her sons. That was special for her. My niece really enjoyed the London Sea Life Aquarium which puts to shame our membership and multiple trips over the years to the New England Aquarium! Then I got to take them to Westminster Abbey for afternoon tea. Look, that isn’t my thing and I’m not sure if my mother or niece truly appreciated what they had just done but I knew it was special and I hope my niece realizes that even more when she is much older. We hopped on the “Last Train to Paris” and took Paris by storm! I made sure we stayed right next to the Louvre and we walked by it and through it’s amazing gardens every day we were there. And I got a pic of my mother and niece with the Mona Lisa. I know I take a lot of pics when I’m with my nieces and nephews. Sometimes pissing them off. I get it. But I try my best to capture these rare memories for them that they can look back on one day. God knows I didn’t have anyone that cared enough about me when I was a kid to do shit like this for me. And one cool memory about Paris…several memories actually, was getting to see my niece enjoy real French crepes. The girl loves her crepes yo. And I even got her to try some escargot. But not the frog legs. That was something to see. My mother enjoyed her French wine. A lot. She even got to light a candle inside of Notre Dame. So my mother has now been to two of the world’s most famous churches doing her best to keep me out of hell! LOLz. And the three of us enjoyed the Eiffel but my niece and I were the only two to trek it up to the very top. But the three of us did go to the very bottom of Old Paris through the catacombs. We walked all over those two amazing cities and I couldn’t have had a better time with two of my favorite girls.

London and Paris are two of the oldest, most amazing, interesting and magical cities on this huge beautiful planet. To be able to take people I care about on vacation to destinations none of us were “meant” to visit makes me so fucking proud. Because I wasn’t supposed to be doing any of this. But I am. And if I am, then so will the people I care about. Because that’s why I do what I do. It isn’t just for me. It’s for them. And I hope they get that. I really do. Both London and Paris will always have a special place in my heart. But I love Boston the best.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 329: Halloween Sixteen

I don’t know if this pic is actually spooky, but I think it is one of the spookiest pics I have taken so I’m going to consider it my “Halloween Pic” to complement this T-pisode. You all will just need to accept that like I did, ok?

I don’t know if this pic is actually spooky, but I think it is one of the spookiest pics I have taken so I’m going to consider it my “Halloween Pic” to complement this T-pisode. You all will just need to accept that like I did, ok?

 

Two things I learned with this site over the last seven years… One, there are a SHIT TON of holidays that fall on Mondays. Oh yeah there is! Two, people are usually doing that specific holiday related stuff instead of spending their time here reading my amazing tales. As they should. It’s cool, yo. So, since it was well documented here many, many years ago that I am not too big on Halloween, I will keep this T-pisode short and to the point.

Why even do a Halloween T-pisode? Well I am capable of putting my take on Halloween and turning it into something about T. I’m gifted like that. Plus, Halloween has only fallen on a Monday AKA “T-blawg Day” once before in the last seven years and that was on October 31, 2011. Figured I’d give it another whirl. Anyway, what’s my “Halloween Sixteen” take? Halloween is and will always be for the kids. I love seeing all the little kiddies in my life in their cute costumes enjoying the holiday. I still believe that no adult should be playing dress up on this day unless they are a parent doing a costume matching thing with their kid. I hope to one day dress up in a costume for my kids. Shit, I’ll even dress like a Disney princess if my future daughter wanted me to and I would even like it. Until that day… For now, I’ll still like a “Slutty Something” pic here and there on social media. Because some women use Halloween as an excuse to get down. To each their own. Some people like putting on the costumes because they don’t know how to live honestly year round like other people do. Like me. Maybe that’s why I really don’t like costumes? Because I’m not into deception and trickery like so many others out there? Hmmmm….could be. Could be.

So happy Halloween to all you people who enjoy this silly ass holiday!!! Go dress up. Eat the candy. Give out the candy. Slut it up. Zombie it out. Chase down the “Great Pumpkin” if you can outrun all those killer clowns out there! I’m kidding. Not really. Make sure the kiddies enjoy the day though because it’s really for them, not you. But most importantly, let out that person that you cannot be any other time during the year and have at it. And all the ghouls and goblins are all out for the day while I’m over here still being T. Happy Halloween Sixteen.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 328: The Block

This is close to the scene of the crime where I put “The Block” into actual play just this past summer.

This is close to the scene of the crime where I put “The Block” into actual play just this past summer.

 

We now live in a world where you can almost totally “block” someone out of your life. We all have the ability to “unfriend” or “unfollow” then “block” someone on all forms of social media. Our phones now come with the ability to “block” someone’s phone number so you never ever have to receive another text or phone call from them ever again. It gives you the friggin’ ability of having to never hear their voice or having to read their silly written words again for the rest of your life! And if you find a way to go out of well…your way, you “physically” do not have to see them ever again. Damn, son. Damn.

So why do we do it? Why do we “block” in this day and age? Mostly it’s because some people just suck. LOLz. Some people just annoy the hell out of you on social media and in real life and now that you have the option to get them out of your life you know damn well you’re pulling that block trigger. But let’s not bullshit who it’s really for…the exes. No doubt. And everyone that your ex knows. Wait, is that just me??? Whatever. Social media and phone blocking brings out the pettiness in all of us. You have the option to be petty not just block. Who are we shitting? Grown ass adults acting like children in grade school basically saying “I don’t like you anymore” like a second-grader would say to another second-grader at recess. Petty? Yes. Silly? Fo’ sho. But when you’re done with someone, you’re done with them. In all ways, shapes and forms in 2016. Sometimes you don’t even want to acknowledge them in person. Like I did this past summer. Boston is a very small city for someone like me. I made the city my own private playground and every once in a while someone I used to play with ends up on the swings looking for a push. I’ll always be a gentleman for sure but if I have the option to not talk to someone who I blocked on social media or blocked me, I’m not saying a damn word. You get to stare at my back and I have nothing to say to you. All night long. Why? Because you got “The Block” honey and that’s just how it goes sometimes.

I wish that we didn’t block. I wish that there weren’t as many evils that sometimes outweigh the goods on social media. And I wish even as grown adults who once shared something special with other grown adults we could all go on speaking and catching up with each other without any ill will when we cross each other’s paths out in the wild. But that’s wishing. That’s not reality. And in this reality we have blocks and pettiness and unfollowings and unfriendings o’plenty. For worse more than for better.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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2016 Bye Week

F*ck Cancer

F*ck Cancer

 

Just like how my beloved New England Patriots get a bye week every season I have decided to give myself one! I have to move some pieces around and will return next Monday with a brand spanking new T-pisode 328.

I promise.

And how about them Patriots???

 

-T

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T-pisode 327: An Alpha Male Needs An Alpha Female

The sun is the center of our universe and the most dominant star in the sky. I’m also a Leo and all those things that come along with being a Leo. I’m an alpha male. I finally realize now that I need an alpha female.

The sun is the center of our universe and the most dominant star in the sky. I’m also a Leo and all those things that come along with being a Leo. I’m an alpha male. I finally realize now that I need an alpha female.

 

Let’s just get to it today, shall we?! I am an alpha male. You know it. I know it. Every damn person in my life knows it. Every woman I have ever dated knows it. The people at the office know it. My mailman knows it. Tom Brady knows it. All of Boston and the entire fucking internet knows it. T is an alpha male, baby! And my definition of an alpha male in one T style sentence is this… A man who is so dominant, so successful, so confident, so on top of his game that his presence is felt the second he walks into a room and still felt even after he has left because his aura is so distinct and he is absolutely unfuckwithable that everyone else has no choice but to fucking respect everything about him. Therefore, this alpha male can only be complemented by an alpha female. I have decided.

I’m no longer looking for a woman who does not have her shit together. I cannot date any woman who still gets financial support, food and shelter from her parents. I cannot entertain a childish little girl who would rather play games than have a conversation. I can’t be around any women who think the male characters they read about in their books or watch on their TV shows actually exist and are holding out for them to come to life. I no longer want to scale the giant brick walls that women put up because their exes and fathers caused them to build from abuse, neglect or deeply placed insecurities. I can’t be in relationships with women who entertain every loser who gives them social media attention because they are SO insecure that they constantly need attention from every male in a five foot radius. Less dominant women constantly can’t make decisions. They can’t express themselves through intelligent adult conversations. Less dominant women complain that they can’t get ahead in their careers because someone is holding them back. I can’t be around women who don’t appreciate me or look for the smallest flaw or shortcoming that I have and turn it into something big enough to either fight with me or end it with me because they are borderline insane. I don’t want to entertain the crazy. I’m sick of deeming women bipolar. And I no longer want someone who cannot make any type of decision when it comes to not only our relationship but when it comes to bettering herself and her life. This is what I have decided today. And this is why I have finally realized that I can only be with an alpha female. She needs to match me. My intelligence. My passion. My work ethic. My hustle. My need for structure. My need for spontaneity. My love for travelling. My love for life. My ability to put everyone I care about before myself. I am an alpha male. I can only satisfy a true alpha female and only a true alpha female can satisfy me. We don’t need each other. We’re good on our own. But if and when we finally come together…

There are very few alpha males in this world. I know that is a damn fact. And I have to believe that there are even fewer alpha females. Because I have come across so many females on this planet and not a single one has been an alpha thus far. But now, I am making it my mission to find her. It’s time for me to stop fucking around now that I finally know who and what I want. Who and what I need. The hunt for my alpha female has begun. And when I find her, there will be no stopping US. I have decided.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 326: The Rollercoaster Theory

The Zakim Bridge in Boston is the closest thing I have to a rollercoaster pic, people. Sorry. I’m still banned from most amusement parks from my teenage years.

The Zakim Bridge in Boston is the closest thing I have to a rollercoaster pic, people. Sorry. I’m still banned from most amusement parks from my teenage years.

 

Ups and downs. That’s life. Ups and downs. Work. Relationships. Friends. Family. Dating. Health. Sports. Money. Love. Everything you look at in your life has had its ups and downs. Everything for the rest of your life will have its ups and downs. The goal is to stay up in all aspects of your life for as long as possible. Right? But if you never fall down, if you don’t hit the bottom every once in a while, then you cannot truly appreciate the ups when they happen. Right? Life is a rollercoaster people. And nothing is more like a rollercoaster than the world of dating. I present…The Rollercoaster Theory.

Back to back dating T-pisodes? Yep. And I have a few more coming up the next few Mondays. Deal with it. I have spent a big chunk of my time convincing myself that I don’t like drama. That I don’t want the excitement and spontaneity that comes with dating the younger, “wild” girls that I have been prone to date in the past. I have spent a large amount of time convincing myself that I would never go back to dating the same women I have dated in the past. But yet with some, I have done sequels and even trilogies with others. I have spent a TON of time and energy telling myself and my closest friends that I’m ready to live a “normal” life. Buy that house in the ‘burbs. Get a wife. Spit out some kids. Have Sunday cookouts. Start those annual Disney trips that everyone else my age has done on Facebook. Shit, maybe even start posting some of those “my kid is going back to school” by grade pics that they love posting so much. Thank God my mother never made me do that shit. Thank God again that social media didn’t exist when I was a kid. Anyway…I’m on an up in many aspects of my life. I’m on a climb in other areas as well. That’s good, right? But the only place I still get the downs along with the ups is when it comes to dating. Shit, sometimes I even get those wicked turns and insane drops out of nowhere like on a rollercoaster when it comes to dating! What I’m saying is…I like rollercoasters. Hell, I love them. So I think I’m always going to look for an adventure when it comes to dating. The most fun ride in the park. The reason why I paid to be in the park. But what I’m also saying is…I don’t need to go on all the other rides anymore. I just want to ride the rollercoaster. With one last person to go on the ride with. To enjoy it with.

Life is a rollercoaster. And no one likes to ride the rollercoaster by themselves. Sure, you’ll go on it by yourself if the group of friends you’re with has uneven numbers. Sometimes you’ll jump on with the stranger you just met in line. But it would be nice to go up and down, whip left to right, scream and scare the shit out of yourself with someone next to you that you enjoy riding the rollercoaster with. It’s just better that way. And that’s…The Rollercoaster Theory.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 325: Chasing The Dragon 2 – Never Chase

I have yet to take a pic of a dragon. I swear I will get one someday. But in the meantime, I think this pic fits this T-pisode because the windows look like they are on fire. Dragons breathe fire. Get it? Ahhh, forget it!

I have yet to take a pic of a dragon. I swear I will get one someday. But in the meantime, I think this pic fits this T-pisode because the windows look like they are on fire. Dragons breathe fire. Get it? Ahhh, forget it!

 

Back in 2013, I wrote this T-blawg classic…Chasing The Dragon. About why you should never waste your time trying to make something happen with someone when it will never happen. Two people know when they want each other enough to make it happen so don’t chase the damn dragon and I coined another phrase here. It’s what I do, yo. Then when I took my month-long summer break from here a couple of months back some shit went down with some women that inspired me to come out guns blazing with a bomb ass sequel! Here is that so-called bomb ass sequel.

Another form of chasing the dragon happens when you breakup. Whether it was you who caused the breakup, the other person who caused it or even a mutual breakup, don’t chase them after the breakup. I don’t give a shit what the reason was that led to the breakup. I don’t give a shit if you have this dying hunger to find out what their reason was either. Fuck closure at this point. Fuck wanting them back. There isn’t anything on God’s green Earth that will make them want to come back to you. Once it’s over, regardless of the reason, it’s over. NEVER CHASE. This mainly applies to short-term dating. I mean if you’ve been together a long time or if you’re engaged or married, then yes, don’t give up after one stupid ass silly fight. Try to resolve that shit you idiots. That’s common sense. Hopefully the love is strong in that case. But if it’s short-term or casual dating? Don’t chase that other person. Once they have checked out, das it! Party over. Swallow your pride and don’t bother calling them. Not once. Don’t send a story to them in a text. Do not text them 87,000 times without them responding one damn single time. Do not social media stalk their asses. Don’t be stupid and think your Instagram memes and quotes or Facebook updates or tweets or doing any of that other direct or indirect subliminal social media shit is going to convince them to come back. Because they’re not coming back. You’re chasing the proverbial dragon when you do that. And you never catch the dragon people. Never.

Breakups are usually painful. For the most part. And you prolong that pain by trying to chase the dragon. One thing that has come with dating for as long as I have dated and at the age I am now is I know that when it’s over, it’s over. No tears will be shed. No sleep will be lost. No calls will be placed. No texts will be typed. Not a single second of my time nor a single ounce of my energy will be wasted chasing the dragon ever again. I recommend to all of you that you do the same as well. Ol’ T says, let that dragon fly, fly the fuck away.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 324: Dating T

I promise you this, if you date me you can have any dessert you like but I’ll be getting a port. Preferably a 20 to 30 year tawny. *Pic shown from an actual date. LOLzzzzz.

I promise you this, if you date me you can have any dessert you like but I’ll be getting a port. Preferably a 20 to 30 year tawny. *Pic shown from an actual date. LOLzzzzz.

 

Dating. Without a doubt one of my fortes. Am I good at dating? You bet your sweet ass I am. Do I enjoy dating? I sure do. Is there a difference between dating and hooking up? Without a doubt. Am I good at relationships? Honestly? Depends on whom you ask. There are a select few who will give you different opinions on that. Both good and bad. But my take is that I’m not good at relationships. I try. God knows I try. And I’m getting better. I know that. Today though I am here to talk about what it is like dating me. Why? Because I’ve told so many dating stories shaped by the women I’ve dated and my experiences with them. Today I’m going to give my point of view on what it is like dating me.

This isn’t about hooking up. I’m not getting into my past relationships today. I’m not putting any specific women AKA “The Famous Nameless” on blast this Monday. No. I want to get on wax as they used to say in hip hop, a digital recording of what it is like to date me. How I date. How I woo. The wine & dine. First and foremost, I’m a gentleman. I like calling the woman. I enjoy opening the door. Pulling out the chair. I have no problem taking her on a trip. To a museum. I’m a member to several. I love art. I know it. I can talk it. I appreciate it. I appreciate her. I’ll take her to Paris. Because I can and I want to. I like long walks talking and laughing about everything through the streets of Boston. Through the Public Garden. Through the Commons. Through the Comm Ave. Mall. I know Boston better than anyone. ANYONE. I enjoy a good restaurant. A good meal. I don’t need to save for dates or count my dollars. Because I work hard and make a good living. I’m blessed like that. Therefore whoever dates me is also blessed in ways. I said earlier I appreciate her. I also said I am a gentleman. But if I don’t feel appreciated back, then the dating stops. Just like that. I like to laugh and I like to talk. There WILL be a lot of laughing and a lot of talking on my dates. I also like to listen. Especially to the ones that have something to say. When I date, I don’t break eye contact. You have my attention. I try my best to keep my phone in my pocket but if I open up to you then you will know that I am both a busy and an important man so the phone may come out on the occasion. But rest assure, I will politely apologize if I have to take it out. One thing I really enjoy is dating to her needs. Her wants. I WILL pay attention when she tells me her favorite food, restaurant, dessert, wine, ice cream, parts of Boston… Then I will do my best to incorporate all of those into our dates. I date to please. I don’t apologize for that. It’s a part of the wooing. The wine & dine. Good, bad or ugly… I always pay. For everything. EVERYTHING. The man is supposed to pay. You can save that equality shit for other things honey or for the young, broke dudes. A grown man pays for every part of the date. In the early stages, middle stages and the long runs. That’s dating. Dating is supposed to be fun. Enjoyed. The woman should be spoiled but not too much and not too soon. Not to the point where she stops appreciating you. That’s when she starts to check out. That’s when the chemistry sometimes goes away and turns into math. Like high school. By math I mean, now you’re counting. Not the money spent on the dates but counting the times you were “supposed to see each other”…”supposed to call”….”supposed to text back”…”supposed to ‘like’ her pic”… Dating is not counting. Dating is not keeping score. Dating is not forgetting to communicate. Dating is not assuming. Dating is not speculating on what you see and do not see on social media. When any of that happens, it sucks. It really does. Dating is NOT supposed to suck. And dating T is supposed to be special for both me and for her. So when the “special” stops then dating me stops. Just…like…that.

Like I said, I love dating. I enjoy dating. I love to flirt. I love to laugh. I love to have sex. I love to enjoy the city. I love to eat. I love to go to games. I love that I can afford a good life. I love women. And I’ll keep dating and doing all these things I have written about today until I only want to date just one last woman. And then that’s when SHE and only she gets all my attention and she gets everything else that comes along with me. And not just the dates. There is more than the dates. Oh trust me there is. But that’s for another day. Now you know what it is like dating T.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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9/11…15 Years Later

In honor of the 15th anniversary of 9/11 I am not posting a new T-pisode today. Instead, I am sharing the 9/11 post I wrote and shared on September 13th, 2010.

Below is a link to T-pisode 40: September 11th, 2001. My day on 9/11.

https://t-blawg.com/2010/09/13/my-september-11th-2001-post/

 

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T-pisode 323: Return To Grown Man Shit

Fuck yo cigar collection! LOLzzz.

Fuck yo cigar collection! LOLzzz.

 

Fellas, you ever feel like you’re off a step? Like, suddenly you wake up one day and somehow you start putting this math together in your head and realize that you’ve been so caught up in your life, been so damn busy, that your swagger done lost that pep? Yeah, you have. It happens to the best of us. It happened to me recently. Without even knowing it, I fell off my “Grown Man Shit.” And now it’s back. Now I’m back.

Grown Man Shit… The T-blawg anthem. The T motto. MY fucking creation. I always practiced it and I always preached it. Then I fell off. Without laying it all out here today, believe me I will in future T-pisodes, one by fucking one…I have been off my “Grown Man Shit.” I woke up recently, like really WOKE up and gave myself a “Rocky styled” eye to eye in my bathroom mirror and was all like “T, the fuck happened to you?” Every once in a while you have to remind yourself who you are fellas. Below the surface. Below the day-to-day. And take a look at what makes you a real man. Remember why you got balls. Testosterone. A hairy chest. Why your voice is deep and how it booms when you need it to. Why you can kill a bottle of whiskey in one sitting. Because we’re fucking men. And the kind of men on their “Grown Man Shit” deserve that respect. I’m not defining it here again today. I’ve already done that. You should know what it is by coming here every Monday even on holidays. Just remember this, distractions and people, women and things that are not worth your valuable time or attention will occasionally knock you off your “Grown Man Shit.” Just make sure it’s temporary and find your way back. ALWAYS find your way back. YOU know what you bring to the table and make sure you DO NOT let anyone else at that table that does not deserve to sit there. To eat there. To feed off you. To hear your knowledge. To even fucking slightly bask in the glory of your damn masculine presence, son!!! The cream of the crop does not need to entertain anyone or anything not worthy of his time. Be a king of kings. Wear that crown and sit on your earned fucking throne. You are a conqueror. You are a leader. You are your own man. And “Grown Man Shit” is the top-level boys and make sure you stay there once you have earned it.

The next series of T-pisodes are going to be a little vintage T mixed in with some new T shit. I got my swagger back. The money knots are thick. The muscles are swole. The ink from the tats is dry. The passport has fewer pages to be stamped. The all black whip goes a buck sixty, swiftly. The beard is more than epic. The texts are ignored. The numbers are blocked. The little girls had their fun and the real beautiful & intelligent ladies are still wined, dined and smiling wide. The clock has been restarted. I can’t fuck with anyone or anything less than that, baby. Humble people who need to be humbled fellas. Put your chest out, chin up and walk with an incomparable confidence that cannot be fucked with. Because it’s back to “Grown Man Shit” around here.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 322: One Hell of a Woman

Only person in T-blawg’s almost 7-year history to do the “T-blawg Pose” without the traditional style baseball hat and tip of the brim salute! Yeah…she special.

Only person in T-blawg’s almost 7-year history to do the “T-blawg Pose” without the traditional style baseball hat and tip of the brim salute! Yeah…she’s special.

 

T-blawg is made up of everything that makes me…me. A big part of my life is the small inner circle that I have written about several times here over the years. The circle has become smaller but the majority of the people in it have been a part of my life for decades. I can’t think of many people who have come along in the last 6 years and immediately found a place in that circle. In my life. In my heart. But one person in particular comes to mind and she has just hit one hell of a milestone birthday. So I’m going to do one of my birthday tributes as best I can for her…

I started a contract job back on Thanksgiving week 2010 and it would later become the best “long-term & full-time” move of my “daytime” career. A few weeks later around the week of New Year’s Eve 2010, she started. NOW, my kryptonite as far as women go is well documented here. That week I happen to walk by her cube and I see her…the dark hair and the blue eyes. “Son of a bitch” I thought. It only took a matter of hours before we struck up a conversation in the kitchen. We would spend the next year on the same floor getting to know each other and the rest became history… Over the years I can’t think of anyone I “talk” to, AKA text a hundred times a day more than her. We make each other laugh daily. Bust each other’s chops all the time. Have the same taste in TV shows. Love sushi. Enjoy traveling the world. Work in the same damn industry. And probably both will be “forever single” haha. We give each other advice when we’re dating. Go to each other when we’re hurting. Know when we need to hear some hard truth from one another. And honestly, I can’t help but compare every girl I have dated to her because she is the standard and raised the bar for all women out there that I come across in my life now. A couple of years ago she faced a tough time and when I went to see her in the hospital she asked ME how I was doing. I was going through a “mini” health problem with my arm and going through a tough break-up. She asked how MY mother was doing with her health. Here she was in the hospital and was more concerned about me and my well-being than any woman I had ever dated in my life. It was tough seeing her like that but I got to see just how damn strong she really was by overcoming everything that she did not deserve to suffer through. But she is one of the strongest people I know and now forever will be one of the most important people in my life.

For years it was tough for me to have female friends. Let alone attractive as all holy hell female friends who have no problem putting me in my place when I need it. So I am very lucky to have her in my life. And on this special birthday I have to let you know that you are my bestie…my favorite “meme” person…my real life better looking than Mila Kunis pal…my plus one…my sushi day date…my “hoeing” tendency correcting…broomstick witchy…little confused stuffed white monkey texting…favorite post-it leaving and I’ll never remove from my computer screen…will never stop flirting with you…I can’t wait until “Game Of Thrones” starts again…person that you are!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! And you got your own T-pisode, honey ;).

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 321: The Birthday T-pisode VII

The sun is setting over Fenway and on one hell of a decade long run. 365 days until a new decade of dominance begins baby...

The sun is setting over Fenway and on one hell of a decade long run. 365 days until a new decade of dominance begins baby…

 

I’m back.

After a month-long “summer break” I am back with my annual “birthday” T-pisode. This one is going to be short and to the point because I think I have covered almost everything when it comes to reflecting on my life every year on my birthday here the last seven years. My epic birthday celebrations are long gone and I now focus on the little things like “the thoughts that count” when it comes to my birthday. Look, I’ll never get the types of gifts I give people but that doesn’t matter to me. What matters is who and how my birthday is recognized and that gives me a good idea of what I mean to that person so this year I’m using my birthday as a road sign. Yep. Next year I’m coming up on one hell of a milestone birthday and this year’s birthday is allowing me to change course slightly. I’m good. I’m cool. I’m physically good. I’m financially good. I’m building out my own custom position in my daytime career. I’m finishing another draft of the book. And I just submitted three TV pilots off to Hollywood. I’m still on my A-Game but this birthday lit a new fire under my ass and I’m giving myself 365 days to kick ass like never before. It’s on. The next 365 days will see a lot of change in my personal life and my T-blawg life.

As I have said several times before on here… Get your popcorn ready… AND happy birthday to me.

The next batch of T-pisodes are going to be something too.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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Summer Break!

Taking a little summer break people!

All new T-pisodes returning Monday, August 22nd with T-pisode 321.

 

I’ll still be on social media!

-T

 

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T-pisode 320: WTF?!

This is the last pic I took before all the fucking insanity was unleashed into the world and flipped it upside down.

This is the last pic I took before all the fucking insanity was unleashed into the world and flipped it upside down.

 

This is going to be one of those impromptu kind of pissed off no holds barred T-pisodes that put T-blawg on the map circa 2009-2012. Why? Well of course I’m going to tell you why. I planned on writing a new batch of T-pisodes this weekend. Lately I have written them in blocks of five. Like I did with my 5-part “Keys To Happiness” series after the Orlando shooting. I had a T-pisode in mind for today about the nonsense that caused my last dating relationship to end. I had a couple of possible sequels ready to go too. I even had an “Eastie Boys Reunion” one I was going to write. But instead, the world went fucking nuts right before my vacation to London & Paris and then went even more nuts while I was on vacation and is going more, MORE nuts as I write this.

WHAT…THE…FUUUUCK??? I have steered away from politics, religion, race issues and their likeness for most of the life of T-blawg. But not today. No way, son. I’m letting it fucking rip. Click away now if your sensitive ass isn’t ready for bad boy T’s return. The gentleman took today off. You ready? In the last six weeks the WHOLE world suffered. The WHOLE world. The Orlando shooting to the shooting deaths of two black men to the shootings of police officers in Dallas to the tragedy in Nice, France to the craziness that is happening now in Turkey. This has caused people to react in many ways. Mostly like assholes in my opinion. I know assholes. I grew up an asshole surrounded by even bigger assholes. But not like this. I never hated someone because of their race. Their religion. Their sexuality. This is a different type of asshole. The kind where people are selecting from issues that only matter to them. The kind of hate and assholeness that is dividing the world even more. People want to point fingers at Obama. People want to point fingers at all young black men. People want to point fingers at all cops. People want to say that an attention hungry, insane businessman and reality show star Donald Trump will fix things without any political experience or a realistic platform. People are saying a lot of crazy and stupid shit on social media and on the news adding more fuel to the fires lit across the globe. You can’t choose when it comes to things like this. You can’t pick and choose which tragedy or issue makes you upset over another tragedy or issue. Fuck #ANYKINDOFLIVESMATTER bullshit. The whole world is going down the toilet and a lot of us are doing the flushing. Are you all insane?! People are dying because they’re black. Because they’re gay. Because they’re cops. Because religious extremists are distorting religions as a reason to kill. People are dying because there are the kind of guns out there in the streets that shouldn’t be in the hands of regular citizens. People are dying because there are people out there filled with so much hate and finding ways to kill others even without guns…without bombs…without war. This is the world we live in now?

You’re not an asshole because you are white or black. You’re not an asshole because you’re a cop. You’re not an asshole because you are gay. You’re not an asshole because of you’re religion. You’re an asshole because you’re an asshole. You’re an asshole first and your skin color, sexuality, occupation, tax-bracket and religion are all a distant fucking second. Stop using all of that as a reason for being an asshole. For a reason to hate. We all need to smarten the fuck up. It’s 2016. We should be progressing instead of rapidly regressing. Shit. And as much as I teased the shit out of people for playing Pokemon Go this past week, when I left the office and walked past a popular Boston landmark every day after work I saw people of every race, color and religion having fun with that silly game. Together. Smiling and chasing those little stupid invisible things. Don’t tell me this world can’t be saved. There are still good people in this world. There is still a lot of good. I truly believe that. It’s just a little harder to see or find right now. So try being good more, people. For humanity. For all of us. What the fuck…

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 319: Keys To Happiness Part 5: Always Smile

I walk by the Swan Boats and think of my childhood trips into the city. Then I walk by the bench my grandfather used to sit on in the Boston Common when he took me into the city. Both make me smile. Good and bad smiles.

I walk by the Swan Boats and think of my childhood trips into the city. Then I walk by the bench my grandfather used to sit on in the Boston Common when he took me into the city. Both make me smile. Good and bad smiles.

 

*There is just too much hate & sadness going on in the world today so I’ve decided to do a 5-part T-pisode series about my own personal keys to happiness in this crazy thing we call life.

 

Smile. Das it. No matter what. Smile. That’s how I’m closing out this five-part “Keys To Happiness” T-pisode series. I smile a lot. Maybe too much. Most of the time I smile it’s because I’m up to something bad. I’m being a pain in the ass. I’m being a wiseass. Or I’m flirting with a beautiful woman. Or maybe I’m smiling at someone who is trying to talk shit about my Boston teams and they have NO chance in winning an argument with me. So I smile. And I also smile because I laugh a lot. My mother embedded into my brain at an early age when we were piss poor in East Boston that “No matter how bad things are, you have to find a way to laugh.” I smiled just now when I wrote that. Thanks again, Ma.

Smile. It doesn’t matter if you don’t want to get out of bed and head into the office on a beautiful day. Just do it and smile while you do it. It’ll make it easier, trust me. Smile. Even if you don’t want to go to the gym tonight after a long day at work. Put on your headphones, thump a good playlist and get your workout on while smiling. Even if you look crazy to everyone else in the gym for smiling! Smile. Fellas, go up to that pretty girl and talk to her. Smile the entire time you do it. It will up your confidence and maybe you might make her smile too. Smile. Ladies, we KNOW you hate it when a guy tells you to smile. We KNOW. But you have no idea what it is like for us guys to see a beautiful woman smile. Especially if we’re the reason you are smiling. Smile…smile…smile! Good or bad…Easy or tough…Sunshine or cloudy days…Just go about your day with a smile on your face and do what you can to make someone else smile almost every day. Yeah, I know it sounds corny. Yeah, I know it sounds easier said than done. But I am sick of seeing a world where things like “resting bitch face” is acceptable. Or where everyone seems to go on social media to just complain about everything in the world while ending their tirades with sad or angry face emojis. I’m not saying a smile will change the world. I’m not saying that holding the door open with a smile for a stranger will bring world peace. I am saying it costs you next to nothing to smile except a small chance that someone else may smile because of it.

Smile. All day long. Even if you’re sad. Even if you’re pissed. Think of a reason to smile. Someone or something that makes you smile. Look at a crazy meme on Instagram. Text your best friend. Think about that time you took that beautiful woman out and she told you that was the best date of her life. Because guess what? You’ll smile. Because at that moment you are happy. Smiling and happiness go hand in hand yo. The more smiles we see in the world then the more happiness we will have as well. It’s not that hard people. We just need more of it. Smile.

Next week…I get back to usual T-blawg business.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 318: Keys To Happiness Part 4: F*ck Normal

I still live in the city because living in the city and seeing sunsets over the CITGO sign near Fenway Park make me happy. And you don't get to see this in the suburbs everyday.

I still live in the city because living in the city and seeing sunsets over the CITGO sign near Fenway Park make me happy. And you don’t get to see this in the suburbs everyday like I do.

 

*There is just too much hate & sadness going on in the world today so I’ve decided to do a 5-part T-pisode series about my own personal keys to happiness in this crazy thing we call life.

 

I’ve gone on record here several times about how my life isn’t normal. SEVERAL. I have gone on and on about not settling…why I don’t care about what other people my age are doing…why I’m not living in the suburbs and drinking beer in front of the TV and battling with my wife after my 9-5 job until the kids go to bed…why annual Disney vacations aren’t appealing to me…why I’m covered in ink while having a kick ass corporate America day job gig…why I write scripts and get on movie sets..why I travel the world every chance I get…why I do mud races that electrocute me…how I still can date girls almost half my age…why I KNOW I created the hat low thing…why I still come here every Monday…BECAUSE my life isn’t normal! And I love it. I LOVE it.

The definition of normal to me is everything that is opposite of what makes me happy in my life. To me it isn’t even average. Normal is below average. It is sub par. It is boring. It isn’t entertaining. When you live your life with the motto “Live a life that always gives you a story to tell” then you tend to go against the grain. And I’m telling you one more time that you should say “F*ck Normal” and try to achieve a life that is anything but normal. I can’t tell you what to do or how to live your life but let’s not bullshit here. You know damn well whether or not your life is normal. Boring. Whether it leaves you with an unfulfilled feeling almost daily. You know what makes you happy. You know the difference between normal and exciting. It doesn’t matter if you’re young or old. Married or single. It doesn’t have to be normal. Life isn’t a TV show or a romantic comedy that has the same formula ending every single time. Life should be full of adventures. Full of people who you come across in your path and whether good or bad they keep moving you along in life! Staying still, living the norm will not get you that. It is ok to not be normal! When I’m around anyone…ANYONE…they know I’m going to tell one hell of a story. Maybe two or a hundred. They know I’m going to speak my mind and shock them. Entertain them. Make them laugh. Make them feel something. Why? Because living a life that is anything but normal has given me that ability. It has given me complete and total happiness as well. Am I completely fulfilled? No. Not yet. But I am happy. Because I am not normal.

F*ck normal. And f*ck everyone and everything that tries to make you normal like them. You don’t need those people or things in your life. DO NOT let them deflect on to you the things they never had the balls to do or go out and achieve themselves. Don’t let their unhappiness seep into your life and destroy your happiness. I’m not saying that they’re bad people for being normal. I’m saying you’re a bad person if you let someone else make you normal if you don’t want to be. It’s ok to not be normal. It’s ok to say “f*ck normal.” It’s OK to be happy.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 317: Keys To Happiness Part 3: No Drama

Memes make me laugh. Boston’s Museum of Science is one of my favorite places on this planet. Taking pics for Instagram entertains me. And I AVOID drama as much as possible. This pic combines a few of my favorite things that make T happy.

Memes make me laugh. Boston’s Museum of Science is one of my favorite places on this planet. Taking pics for Instagram entertains me. And I AVOID drama as much as possible. This pic combines a few of my favorite things that make T happy.

 

*There is just too much hate & sadness going on in the world today so I’ve decided to do a 5-part T-pisode series about my own personal keys to happiness in this crazy thing we call life.

 

One of the things I’ve been preaching more and more with age is that I don’t have time for nor do I want anyone or anything that brings any sort of drama into my life. At my age I don’t have time for drama. I’m pretty sure I’ve tweeted that? Hmmm. When you grow up in a heavy drama filled environment you end up one of two ways. You either become someone who enjoys and continues to create and dwell in drama or you become someone who wants absolutely nothing to do with drama. I fall into the latter.

I hate drama. Drama sucks the happiness out of life. We all know the people who cause drama. Drama at work. Drama in relationships. Drama on Facebook. Drama when they call you. Drama when they text you. Drama when you see them at family parties twice a year. Drama, drama, drama. And drama is the EXACT opposite of any key to happiness!!! TRUST ME! Drama takes the joy out of everything by causing you to waste your time, feelings and energy on misdirection. One key to happiness? AVOID FUCKING DRAMA. We know drama when we see it. Don’t lie to yourself. It is almost always avoidable. Case in point… When someone in my family causes drama every time I see them? Guess what? I stop seeing them. Yep. When suddenly a woman I’m dating ups and causes me drama just because she wants to or enjoys it or doesn’t know how to communicate with me? I end it. I stop the drama before it sucks the happiness out of my life. I avoid drama. I don’t chase drama. I don’t cause drama. We all watch TV shows and movies and crazy people on social media living out drama. That is entertaining because it’s not happening to you but when it happens to you, it’s not fun. It’s not entertaining. We are all too familiar with drama so you should do your absolute best to avoid it if you really want to be happy. Drama destroys all things happy. Remember that. Know that. Respect that.

The next time you see drama’s ugly head coming over the horizon make sure to run. DO NOT confront drama. That’s what it wants you to do. I’m all about confronting problems and fighting to get your point across but you can’t beat drama. The people who live in that fog of despair will only suck you in. They thrive in it. They embrace the phrase “misery loves company.” So avoid them. Avoid it. No drama is one of the most important keys to happiness and I know this from first hand experience. You’re welcome.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 316: Keys To Happiness Part 2: Small Circle

Meet people. Make friends. See the world. Get to know yourself. But keep your circle tight. Your closest will always make you the happiest.

Meet people. Make friends. See the world. Get to know yourself. But keep your circle tight. Your closest will always make you the happiest.

 

*There is just too much hate & sadness going on in the world today so I’ve decided to do a 5-part T-pisode series about my own personal keys to happiness in this crazy thing we call life.

 

Know what makes me happy? People. No seriously. I mean I’m a wiseass and I tend to bust the balls of everyone I care about. The more I like you, the more I’ll bust your balls. And there isn’t a better group of people whose balls I like to bust more than those select few in my inner circle. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I know A LOT of people. My reach extends from Boston across the country to Los Angeles, Hollywood, etc. to all over Europe now. Yep. Sure does. But I only rely on, love and stay in daily contact with my small circle.

I don’t have to see my small circle everyday. Nope. The key to happiness with a good small circle is that they know you. They know and respect your life. They know and respect your busy schedule. They know and respect your borderline offensive sense of humor. And they love and respect you because they know YOU. Whether I’m sitting with someone from my small circle or whether I’m with a few of them in person or just texting back & forth nonsense throughout the day, I know that I’m loved. They know that I love them. We’re not always in each other’s physical presence but our presence is always felt. It’s a support system when you don’t even need it. Everyday I “talk to” most of my small inner circle in one form or another. If I come across something funny or offensive, I know EXACTLY who I can send it to. Who I can call and laugh about it with. The craziness that comes with loving me means that you also have to put up with me. I know that I’m hard to love. I know that my circle respects my honesty but also hates that about me sometimes. I know that my circle knows how busy I am and that they love my hustle but that they also get pissed when I’m “too busy” for their liking at times. I get it. And they get it. But my life makes me happy and they’re a part of my life. And I’m a part of theirs. Over the years my circle has become smaller and smaller but that center core has remained intact. Some have brought wives and kids into that core circle and I love them all more for it. When I’m down, they all pick me up now in their own special ways. And I couldn’t be more thankful or happier for that. For them.

My small circle will tell me I’m a pain in the ass. That I’m outspoken. That I work too hard. That I’ll probably never settle down. That I’m absolutely insane at times. That I deny that I’m sensitive or passionate. That I get defensive when they’re right and I’m wrong. They know my flaws and my “few” weaknesses. But they also know that even at this age I’m the first one who will put somebody into the ground for each of them. Because their happiness makes me happy. And I’ll always put each of them first as often as I can but I know they understand the sacrifices I make when I can’t or when they don’t see me. For them I try. For no one else then…maybe. But that small circle of friends and family we each have makes each of us who we are because they know what truly makes us happy. And that’s key. See what I did there?

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 315: Keys To Happiness Part 1: “Do You”

We all know what makes us happy so stay the course, do more of it and just keep doing you!

We all know what makes us happy so stay the course, do more of it and just keep doing you!

 

*There is just too much hate & sadness going on in the world today so I’ve decided to do a 5-part T-pisode series about my own personal keys to happiness in this crazy thing we call life.

 

With the Orlando tragedy this weekend and all the politicians and social media throwing around words…words of sadness…without substance…words full of hate…words coming from raw emotion…I had to write something. I’ve seen some stuff in my day. I’ve seen and been through a lot of bad and I am someone full of opinions, thoughts and passion. I wanted to react like everyone else. I wanted to take to social media and “go off” as well. But I caught myself and decided to come here to T-blawg instead.

T-blawg makes me happy. It’s my outlet to the rest of the world where I get to share pieces of my own little world. I can write anything I want here and I have. And I will. Instead of talking about loss and gun control and terrorism and politics and hate, I’m writing about happiness. What makes me happy. What has made me happy. What continues to make me happy. Over the next 5 weeks I’m going to bring happiness here on T-blawg and hopefully into the lives of anyone that comes here every Monday. When I write anything T-blawg, the site, it’s Twitter, it’s Facebook, it’s Instagram…I’m doing me. I turn off my day-to-day and I put the hat on. I pull it down low and I write. Because it makes me happy. What I’m saying is, I do me. “Do you” has been a popular phrase for a while now. We tell each other to “do you” when we’re mad at each other. Like, “I’m all set. Go live your life.” Whether directly or indirectly, we have all been told by someone to “do you.” And that’s EXACTLY what we should all be doing. Live your life. Don’t live in fear. Don’t let hate change who you are inside. Don’t let the hurt make you a different person. “Do you” should mean to you that you are doing whatever makes you happy in your life. And over the next 5 weeks I’m going to do just that. Take an uncharacteristic T-blawg approach by writing all about happiness. Because I think we all need more happiness in our lives.

After today you’ll read about how my small circle makes me happy. How and why you need to avoid drama at all costs to be happy. Why being anything but normal will be sure to make you happy. And why you should always smile no matter who or what hurt you and is no longer in your life. So all that means you should just “do you” and be happy. Now more than ever. We all know what’s going on in the world and it will probably get worse before it gets better unfortunately. But right now here on T-blawg for at least a little while, I’m going to do my best to entertain you and make us all happy.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 314: 75 Minutes

Temporary blindness was the much needed disconnect and moment of tranquility I never really allow for myself. And that realization scared the hell out of me.

Temporary blindness was the much-needed disconnect and moment of tranquility I never really allow for myself. And that realization scared the hell out of me.

 

I don’t know if I’ve ever written about my vision on here? Don’t know if I ever had a reason to until now? But if you were wondering, my vision was terrible up until a week ago. My vision started to decline in my left eye around the 8th grade and then the right eye started to go in my late teens. I wasn’t blind as a bat, I just couldn’t see far away at first. Then things started to get blurry up close. I was supposed to wear glasses during the decline. I never did. I started to wear them in my early twenties until I got sick of them and got contacts. I can’t stand glasses, sunglasses or contacts. And I have these ridiculously long eyelashes that would fall in between my eyeball and contact constantly making it feel like someone was stabbing me in the eye. Good times. So after years of this nonsense I decided to get LASIK. iLASIK like the astronauts to be exact.

I went in last Friday during the long Memorial Day Weekend. The procedure itself is pretty simple and almost completely painless. The prep work of appointments and eye exams before and after are the real hassle. But the iLASIK procedure takes less than 10 minutes on each eye. So I was done with the procedure in 20 minutes. Now here’s what this T-pisode is all about. After the procedure you have to keep your eyes completely shut for two straight hours. And you can’t fall asleep during those two hours. Because your eyes move like crazy (REM) when you’re asleep and that would cause problems with your new “flaps” rubbing against your eyelids. So I spent about 15 minutes in a room after the procedure then the doctor let me go. Of course I couldn’t drive with my eyes closed so I had a ride. I got home about 30 minutes after that. So now I had to sit still for the next 75 minutes by myself on my couch with my eyes closed and without falling asleep. SO…that meant for ME…NO work, no writing, no talking (I was alone now), no texting, no T-blawg, no working out, no social media, no TV, no sports, no movies, no…NOTHING. A guy you all know by now who is always busy, always doing something, always moving was forced to do NOTHING in darkness, in silence for 75 straight minutes. My phone alarm was set. The first 15 minutes were brutal. I felt like I was losing my mind. Then something happened… For the next 60 minutes I found this calming peaceful feeling. I never felt like this before. Because I never allowed myself to be still like this before. When I first moved into the city and got into Muay Thai, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and later dirty boxing, one of the techniques I had to incorporate into my training was meditation. At most I did about 15 minutes of meditating during that time. And in THIS moment in those 75 minutes, I realized I hadn’t meditated in about 5 years. I know what road I’m on in my life. But at that moment I felt like I was lost and found my way back. Crazy talk, I know. But I put out every woman, work, writing, health, friend, family, finance and career issue in my life for a solid hour. I found peace inside me that I hadn’t had in a very long time. My brain and mouth were both off and I felt like I knew I was certainly handling most things well in my life. Other things I realized I messed up. And I made that peace with myself. And then I hit the light at the end of the tunnel and the alarm went off. Just like that. My LASIK procedure not only brought my vision back, but it helped to unexpectedly center me. Damn homey.

I’m about a week into life after iLASIK and I couldn’t be happier! The goal was 20/25 vision and it turns out I now have 20/15 vision. So I have like superpowers now. Not really. Just better than 20/20. I haven’t had the time to meditate again. I got right back into the craziness of my life and I don’t know if I’ll find the time to meditate again any time soon. I hope it isn’t in another 5 years though. But right now at least, I feel centered. Peaceful. I could be reacting to a lot of things going on in my life right now in a totally typical “T way” but instead I’m calm. Because I can see differently now. In more ways than one. I leave you all with recommending both iLASIK if your vision is terrible and meditation if your chi is all out of whack. Das it for now!

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 313: T Does Memorial Day Weekend

Just like Honest Abe, I tell no lies. And I’ll always smile when people don’t believe that statement. Oh well.

Just like Honest Abe, I tell no lies. And I’ll always smile when people don’t believe that statement. Oh well.

 

First, Memorial Day is all about the brave men and women in the armed forces who lost their lives defending the good ol’ U-S of A. So respect to all of them and respect to this great country. For all of those who have never served in the military, we get a three-day weekend. Some people tend to go away to beaches or to Miami or to Vegas for the long weekend or just sit around and BBQ and get drunk. Me? My Memorial Day weekends for some reason have been both intentionally and unintentionally full of some memorable moments. Good, bad, ugly and epic. In honor of Memorial Day, I am finally sharing some of those tales.

There was the Memorial Day weekend of the second year of living in the city for me. I lived in Back Bay in a place called “The Boss Condo.” I loved that place. But it was not a condo. I just liked calling it that to piss my friends off. LOLz. I was watching my friend’s puppy that weekend and went out drinking with a friend Friday night after work. After 72 hours of straight debauchery, by Monday I woke up and had a woman from Chicago crying at me, telling me she wanted to leave her husband and move in with me from everything I did with her that weekend. She was in love! Yeah, that was weird. And the poor puppy witnessed the whole thing too! My friend never forgave me for traumatizing her dog. Another year I had a girl go nuts on me in my new place. I picked her up. She stayed. We got into a text battle for like 48 hours and I never heard from her again. I totally mishandled that one. That was on me. My bad. In 2013…I packed my bags and spent 4 days in sunny California with a great lady friend in LA and then with my “West Coast Fam” in Newport Beach. I had way too much fun out there before coming back to Boston and destroying my body in my first Tough Mudder just two weeks later! Good times. Two years ago I spent the long weekend in DC and Philly with a woman I was crazy in love with when we left Boston, but not so much when we came back and to one hell of an unexpected ending. It was my first time in DC too and I still can taste that epic porterhouse I ate in “Bobby Van’s” directly across the street from Obama and the White House! Too bad my arm was torn to shit with nerve damage and I was in throbbing pain the entire time but hey…that physical pain was nothing compared to the crippling emotional pain that followed. LOLzzzzz. Stupid breakups. Last year I spent a part of the weekend watching my oldest and bestest bro dominate on stage in a bodybuilding competition. Dude was building for that moment his entire life and I was hella proud to spend the day watching his dream and hard work come to life on that stage. This year? This year I’m blind! Well not really. I’m going in for a Lasik procedure. Yep. I’m going to pay thousands of dollars to have a laser zap both my eyes and spend the weekend healing up hoping for some super powers. I just hope I don’t die “Final Destination” style. So like I said, my Memorial Day weekends are not normal. Hell no. But they are memorable.

So…you can have your cookouts. Your pool dips. Your lobster colored garbage man sunburns. Your way too many beers and games of cornhole. Enjoy your Vegas benders. Your South Beach hookups. Your Maine, Newport Rhode Island and your silly Figawi runs. Sleep in. Pass out. Facebook and Instagram all of it. Me…I’ll be doing something that only T can do. Every year. Whether I like it or not. But whatever you do, just make sure you know why we have the long weekend and be sure to pay respect in one form or another. Happy Memorial Day.

 

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 312: Hella Options

I chose this pic for certain reasons…If you go to my Instagram…ahem…@tblawg…you will see a variety of takes on this shot. What am I getting at??? It shows that some of us have SEVERAL options when others don’t have many options at all. And a truly successful man always has options, baby. Read below and see, ok?

I chose this pic for certain reasons…If you go to my Instagram…ahem…@tblawg…you will see a variety of takes on this shot. What am I getting at??? It shows that some of us have SEVERAL options when others don’t have many options at all. And a truly successful man always has options, baby. Read below and see, ok?

 

I’m coming in hot, fast and over the top with this one on this Monday folks! This T-pisode is geared towards a specific T-blawg reader. A certain type of…man if you will. This is for the fellas. Not just any fella, but the fellas who are at a place in their lives where they know who they are. Know what they have. Know what they want. And know where they are going. The guys who work their asses off. Take care of their loved ones. Spoil the lucky ladies they date. And serve a purpose on this planet. These men are SINGLE, SUCCESSFUL and DIVERSE. And I’m here today to let my fellow brothers in arms know that they have options. They have HELLA options actually.

Fellas, you have options. Know what your options are. Know that you can do whatever you want when you have reached a certain level in life. Know that you should be able to date whoever you want. Know that you have an Option A when it comes to dating. This is your main option. Respect that option. Be committed to that option if and when it gets serious. If it doesn’t, have an Option B. And an Option C. And D. And so on lined up. Always. When it comes to income know that you should commit yourself to your career. Once you are making a great living make sure you start an Option B, a hobby. Make sure you start an Option C, a passion. Make sure you set up Options D-Z…investing, property, start-ups, small businesses…etc. Get them all going sooner rather than later. The single, successful, diverse gentleman has options. Commit to yourself and know that through that commitment that you can go anywhere on this planet. Build yourself so that you are invaluable to your employer. Take all of your passions, hobbies and intelligent investments and have different revenue streams. Have that young girl come over for wine and pizza or take that classy woman out to that new expensive restaurant that just opened. Sit in the bleachers and get hammered with your old crew or sit in the front row end zone the entire season with your best bro. You have options but you must make sure you are NOT an option to anyone else. Not to any woman. Not to any friend. Not to your company. Not to anyone or anything. YOU are not an option. But you HAVE all the options in the world. Remember this. This level is called “Hella Options” and you can thank me for this by going out this weekend and enjoying each one of your very own options, boys!

I’m not the same T who started this site back in 2009. I didn’t have as many options back then. I sure as hell do now though. My breed…the single, successful, diverse gentleman is the rarest breed. Not every man can claim all three nor should he have to. There are married successful men. There are single men who have not reached success yet. And some men don’t even know what the hell diversity means. These words written here are not for those men today. These words today are for the guys out there who didn’t know they had so many options. They didn’t know that 7 minutes ago or maybe they just needed a reminder. Well you got it. You have hella options. Just like me.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 311: Not Your Cup Of Tea…Pun Intended

Sometimes you can’t even see the storm coming. All you can do is batten down the hatches when it hits and pray you come out the other side heading in the right direction.

Sometimes you can’t even see the storm coming. All you can do is batten down the hatches when it hits and pray you come out the other side heading in the right direction.

 

I’m not giving any advice in this one. Not doing a list here either. No self-imposed rules or life philosophies this week. Not posting about my latest trip to London quite yet. And DEFINITELY not doing my 100th take on dating this Monday after last week that’s for damn sure. No lists! You won’t even see anything about Boston either. Nah ah, sorry. This one is about the man himself. The guy in the title. The one man show you all love to read about. This one is about T. This is about me. The guy you love to hate or the guy you hate to love. Das me. And I don’t give a flying fuck if anyone’s sensibilities get offended on this Monday. So continue at your own risk.

Something I learned about myself writing here and pouring my fucking heart out every week… It really doesn’t matter what your story is or stories are. Sometimes no one wants to hear about how the underdog made it. How one man went from rags to riches. It doesn’t even matter how funny people find you. How entertaining. Your pains, your losses, your wins, your gains…people forget about them sometimes. Charming qualities and education will only go so far too. From bro to gentleman and from the streets to high-rise offices lose it’s appeal. Because all of that isn’t shit if you’re just not someone’s cup of tea. Seriously. Everybody ain’t for everybody. I’m certainly not. You will like me today and you WILL hate me tomorrow. You can laugh at something I write now and then be offended by something else I write next. Why? Because you already have your mind made up about me depending on the latest truth or opinion I shared with you. There’s no need to deflect here. No need to act like I did something different. My life is an open book. I just lift the hat lid high enough for you to get a peek at the man now and then. You come here or you come into my life and you take the good with the bad. Or else you can fucking go. This is T-blawg. I run this place like I run my life. My way. Shit isn’t always going to be emojis and jokes. Shit isn’t always going to be expensive dinners and trips around the world. I have an edge. I come from shit. I made it to the top but I still have flaws. You read them. You embrace them. Or you walk the fuck out the door. I am who I am and at my age I’ve accepted everything good and everything bad that come with being me. You don’t have to. I get it. I really do. But if you want to stay you most certainly are welcome. Just know THAT cup of fucking tea may go cold every once in a while if you let it sit out too long by not drinking it. So sit down. Stay a while. And let’s chat over some hot fucking tea. Get it?

Otherwise, please don’t do the fucking hat pose today and then hate me because of my words here tomorrow. I don’t work that way. You know what this is. You know who I am now. T-blawg is an engine that I built from scratch and sometimes I just start the fucking car and go. Like I do every morning when I get out of bed. Full throttle. I go hard. I go fast. Sometimes I run shit over. I do. I make life look easy because I work very hard at it. You all don’t see that unless I choose to show you. Trust me, it isn’t easy being me. Yes I’ve gotten better at life, but I’m only human and I’m still flawed as fuck. We all are. And maybe, just maybe, you’re just not MY cup of tea either. Maybe you never were. That’s how life goes sometimes. But I’ll take the time out of my busy life to drink that tea while it’s still hot to find out first. That’s for damn sure. That’s me.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 310: Social Media “Just Not Into You” Signs

Having clarity instead of sending mixed signals and not letting the person you’re dating misinterpret things is….wait for itttttt…paramount. Damn, I’m getting good at this!

Having clarity instead of sending mixed signals and not letting the person you’re dating misinterpret things is….wait for itttttt…paramount. Damn, I’m getting good at this!

 

I wanted to get back to my lists and I’m thinking this is going to end up being another T-blawg classic list! Why? Because it is needed. It is honest. It is going to do what my lists usually do…clear some shit up. Basically. Social media can make or break some people, some relationships, let’s be honest. Certain things seen and said or not seen and not said can be misinterpreted or taken exactly how someone wants you take them because they don’t want to be direct with you. Either way, it sucks. So I made a list to clarify some things. When you’re done with this list three things will happen to you people still in the dating game. One…you will start being more honest. Two…you’re going to realize how and why these things below can be taken the wrong way. Three…you’re going to want to start putting on your adult pants and stop letting social media do your dirty dating work for you. Ready? Ok…

 

 

Doesn’t like your pics publicly…This right here makes the person you’re dating think that you don’t want others finding out about them. Or find out that you’re dating them. Looks like you’re hiding something(s) and you are coming off shady. People that date like each other’s stuff and let it be known. Das it.

 

Doesn’t text first or say much…This isn’t really social media but we cycle through our texts along with our social media apps. Sure we do. We all have our apps and texting order that we go through during the day. But adults text and talk to each other. They don’t wait for the other person to “go first” or keep count on who said more or less or texted last. Kids do that.

 

Snaps everyone and their mother but you…If she or he puts everyone in their Snap story but never you? Then they’re seeing other people. Even if they say they’re not. Otherwise, you would be in their story without anything for them to hide. TRUST me.

 

Unfollows an ex but still likes their pics…Why? If nothing was going on with this person then they would still be following them. If they are not following them but still take the time to check out their page and like their stuff, there is still something going on there.

 

Doesn’t respond to your comments publicly…When they take this “offline” to respond to a comment to you instead of doing it publicly for the world to see then this means they still want to appear single. Sure does!

 

Snaps, Grams, Tweets, Facebooks before texting you…When a conversation stops the night before then the first communication that you see from them the next day should be a text before you see them doing anything else. If they post on social media before texting you back then you are absolutely not a priority to them.

 

Doesn’t send “risqué” snaps…Not saying everyone has to send nudes but if you’re not sending anything sexy to each other and not getting busy when you do finally see each other, then something is off. WAY off.

 

Never puts up a relationship status…This speaks for itself. It sends the clearest message and really can’t be misinterpreted. Either put up your real status or no status at all. But keeping single up there when you’ve been dating someone for a while makes you look like a douche.

 

Posts all the nice things you do for them/give them but never acknowledges that it’s you providing these things…Also speaks for itself. When someone cares about you then they will let it be known it’s you doing all these things that make them smile. Period.

 

Ex blatantly posts memes/quotes about them and they “like” them…WHY do you still care or even acknowledge this person and their games? Dumb.

 

Constantly goes through the “friending/unfriending” with someone…This means that other person probably knows about you but they still want attention from them so you’ll see this happening until that person either ends it with you or finally ends it with them. It’s also dumb. LOLz.

 

Responds to an ex/side piece’s meme/quote with one of their own…Meme battles, never a good look yo. WE see when you do it though. Oh yes we do. We just don’t speak on it, but now some of you will. You’re welcome.

 

Never talks on the phone. Ever…None of us are big phone talkers in 2016 but if you don’t want to hear someone’s voice or FaceTime them every once in a while, then you’re heartless af.

 

Likes way too many guys selfies…No need for this. And “like for like” is something middle school kids do. Seriously.

 

Meets someone when out and immediately starts following them on all their social media shit…This means they are interested in this person. Without a doubt. When people meet for the first time and bust out their phones to exchange numbers and all social media info? There’s something happening.

 

The only time you get a sexy pic is when she clearly sent it to several other guys…WE CAN TELL WHEN YOU DO THIS.

 

Goes out of their way to appear “single” on social media when out with friends…First it’s annoying when you share every single second of your night out. Second, looks like you’re doing it to either appear extra cool & single or that you’re rubbing it in the face of the person you’re dating who isn’t with you at that moment. Either way, not a good look. Just so you know.

 

Draws stupid stick figures or uses emojis in the “lonely” selfie with them and calls them “bae” because bae doesn’t “exist”…The person you’re dating may not be your bae but it is hella disrespectful to them when you do this corny shit. Just saying.

 

Their social media posts match up to the social media posts of someone you know they’re seeing on the side but neither of them puts each other into the pics/posts/check ins/stories…SHADY. JUST SHADY. And so obvious. Have some more class than that.

 

Posts way too many selfies because still craves the attention of more than one guy…If you’re over the age of 30, you shouldn’t need the validation of strangers on how your face is still holding up honey. Confidence is sexy. Thirst and insecurity are not. YOU should know you’re beautiful and HE knows you’re beautiful, why do you need more than that?

 

Is constantly on Facebook Messenger late hours…Never a good look. You sure as hell ain’t talking to your grandma honey. And you text friends. SO, who dis???

 

Still on social media well after you got the “Going to sleep, goodnight” text…This girl/guy is just not that into you and is still entertaining others my friend.

 

Her closest friends add the “same guy” she added recently on social media…This means her friends met him and like him and she is definitely seeing someone else besides you homie.

 

Keeps her phone face down all the time…And the number one answer is?! LOLzzzz.

 

So, see what I mean? Either you’re doing the above on purpose or don’t realize how the social media things you’re doing are being interpreted by the other person. Either way, cut the shit. Smarten up. Or just end it already. Social media should be taken with a grain of salt but if it is a big part of how you’re dating someone then you have every right to get your respect if you’re giving it. No need to stalk or get upset, just address it and move on people. And once again, thank ol’ T later!

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 309: The 60/40

If it’s not 50/50 then the relationship is not 100. See what I did there? Yeahhh….you see.

If it’s not 50/50 then the relationship is not 100. See what I did there? Yeahhh….you see.

 

This is something I have experienced on both sides. This is something I have seen in every casual dating, serious relationship, long & short-term engagement and marriage in every partnership around me. I’m calling it “The 60/40.” I don’t know a single relationship that is an equal 50/50 split. Nope. Where both the man and the woman are equal giving partners in the relationship. Not a single one in my time. Not one that I have been in. And certainly not one in any form of relationship I have witnessed from a third-party point of view in all my years on this planet. Some people may not want to read this, but you know what? It’s the truth. And that’s what I do here. Here’s “The 60/40” defined.

A couple of years ago I was in a relationship where I was clearly the one giving 60% and she was giving 40%. How? Why? I don’t know. Maybe because I am too giving in relationships. Maybe because she doesn’t give enough in relationships. Or maybe it was just “our” relationship at the time and that’s how it was supposed to be. But I did and gave and loved a lot more than she did. But I have also been on the other side when I didn’t want to give enough or love enough or participate enough and I was the 40. I see relationships and I see how one gives just a little bit more. Loves a little bit more. Puts a little bit more work in than the other. You see this when one kind of drives the relationship by telling the other what to do, when to do it, how to do it. How one chooses what the couple does and where they go more than the other. How they run the house more. How one picks and chooses what the kids do or what they wear and the other just kind of goes along with it. How one has a “Girls Night Out” more often than the other has a “Guys Night Out.” When one’s personality has a clear stamp on the relationship and the other kind of gives up their entire identity when in a relationship. That’s “The 60/40” in a nutshell. Now I always thought a relationship should be 50/50. But even the casual dating isn’t like that. One has to text first. Call first. Plan the night out more. Ask to see them more. 60/40. Wants to meet their friends & family more. Plans the vacation. Chooses date night out once a month. 60/40. Take a look at your current dating/relationship/marriage. You know damn well if you’re doing juuust a little bit more or if your “partner” is. That’s 60/40. Is this how it’s supposed to be? Is 50/50 impossible? I wonder more now than I did then. Because my goal has always been 50/50 or bust. But I think that is changing.

I don’t know if 50/50 is possible for anyone and honestly? I only care whether or not I’m happy wherever I end up. If I’m happy in a 60/40 then so be it. If I realize I’m not? Then I’m back on the quest of finding that ever-elusive 50/50 relationship. Relationships are a partnership. Love is a partnership. Communication is a partnership. When one does more than the other then you’re on a lopsided ship most likely doomed to sink in the middle of the ocean. And for some reason you are blindsided when the relationship ends…when the marriage results in divorce…or when the dating just stops. But if you pay attention and know what side of “The 60/40” you are on then you’ll be just a little better off my friends. Because I most certainly pay attention a lot more now.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 308: Big Little Brother

One of the few who knows who really created this whole hat low face covering internet pic taking thing and can also truly be called one of my few “day ones” for a reason. For many reasons actually.

One of the few who knows who really created this whole hat low face covering internet pic taking thing and can also truly be called one of my few “day ones” for a reason. For many reasons actually.

 

I haven’t done many birthday tribute T-pisodes in the six and a half years of T-blawg’s existence. But if anyone deserves one then it is one of my closest lifelong friends on a milestone birthday. This guy and I go back…way back. “To when we used to rock the red & black lumberjacks with the hats to match.” That’s a take on a Biggie verse. Because we go back when the man himself was alive and putting out albums. We go back to Eastie. That’s right. One of the few people I grew up with and still have in my life today. This big guy and trust me, he’s a big guy, is my tie to my past life…a supporter of my present…and understands what I’m doing for my future. And I am the same to him. That’s a true friend.

I remember picking him up in one of my early shitbox cars after he would “page” me 911 just go eat some roast beef sandwiches. He would always eat. He would always workout. He would always be the youngest of the crew and he would always be the biggest. Everyone in Eastie knew him and everyone until this day knows him. But I get to call him my brother. I remember that one summer when we were kids and he carried around his “Arnold Schwarzenegger Encyclopedia of Modern Bodybuilding” quoting it like he was a priest and it was his bible. To the time we got “illegally” tatted up together. The time he picked me up on my 21st birthday to go to a “gentleman’s club” that he wouldn’t legally be allowed in for until at least four more years after that. Every movie we saw together. Every time we got in “trouble.” Notice the quotes? To all the parties we partied until we passed out “screaming thug life until I die.” Yep. We were together the night of the Tyson fight when Pac died too. I remember when he went off to college to getting updates from him when he was in NFL training camp. I watched my big little brother grow into one hell of a father who always puts his daughter before everything and everyone. He’s the guy who knows a guy for everything. And I’m glad he’s always been one of my guys. I’ll never forget the time I was out of work and he came and got me. The time I went through a break up and he came and got me. The times my mother went through cancer and he came and got me. And for all those talks we have every Patriots season that cover every single thing that pops into our heads driving to and from that stadium. And for a lot of other things I could never put into writing! That’s my big little brother.

So on this day, this milestone birthday for the guy who truly defines the words…friend…loyal…brother…dependable…and for being the most biggest and physically intimidating person I have ever known but yet so damn chill and laid back and had to calm my hot-headed ass down so many times, but for always having my back… I say… Happy Birthday my dude. Today is your day. But your lifelong friendship is really a gift to me. Because I wouldn’t be the man I am today without you in my life. That’s for damn sure.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 307: Basically Basic

These throwback lists are letting me bring back some of my favorite throwback memes! The “Toy Story Something Everywhere” meme will never be not funny to me. NEVER!

These throwback lists are letting me bring back some of my favorite throwback memes! The “Toy Story Something Everywhere” meme will never be not funny to me. NEVER!

 

*I feel like I haven’t been doing a lot of lists lately so I want to make up for that right now. For the next 4 weeks actually. For T-pisodes 306-309 and the Mondays of 4/11-5/2, I am going old school with some of my infamous lists like only I can. Original, funny and honest. Oh… And I’ll even stay away from using my awesome ‘gram pics up top and use some good ol’ fashioned memes for these lists too!

 

Ok so “basic” is a part of the everyday vernacular now, huh? Alright, I’ll allow it. Unlike “bae” or “fleek” or “it’s lit” I’ll accept this one from the millennial generation…for now. However, even though the definition is more along the lines of people being simple or stupid, I’m putting MY take on it. I’m going more with people kind of being annoying and pretty much being very unoriginal. And I’m seeing a lot of it, basically. See what I just did there? Anyway, here’s what I’m calling basically basic.

 

Quinoa/Kale/Avocados
Man I don’t even know how this happened but so many women are obsessed with these three foods! All I see is how much they love quinoa, kale and ESPECIALLY avocados! WHY?! Do you not know about all the other healthy foods out there or something??? No? I never even heard of quinoa until like a year ago yo. So these are…BASICALLY BASIC

Bye Felicia
Hey millennial women…yeah so you didn’t invent this stupid saying. It actually comes from my Gen-X generation and from a little movie called “Friday” when Ice Cube was Ice Cube and not the Ice Cube kind of Ice Cube you know. Wait, what? Either way, “Bye Felicia” is…BASICALLY BASIC

Starbucks
Stop it. No one NEEDS their Starbucks to get it through the day. You just like saying you NEED your Starbucks to get through the day! And you love seeing your name on those dopey cups. Starbucks is…BASICALLY BASIC

Yoga
I’m all about fitness but you know there are like 10,000 other physical activities people are doing everyday that they don’t let the rest of the world know that they are doing everyday like you crazy ass yoga people, right? Just saying. Yoga is now…BASICALLY BASIC

Adding fit to your social media name
Speaking of fitness… Going to said yoga class once and eating said avocado twice does not make you a social media fitness expert. No seriously, it really doesn’t. So please don’t add “fit” to your social media name and try to give out half ass advice while on your so-called magical fitness “journey” ok? Thank you. Because adding “fit” to your name is…BASICALLY BASIC

Gym Mirror Selfies
Also, no one needs to see your full body gym mirror selfie on that one day you make it to the gym in the early morning trying to convince everyone else that you are there everyday at that time but we all know damn well you’re only going once a month to take that silly ass pic because guess what? We can tell. How? You guessed it! By looking at you in your full body gym mirror selfie!!! LOLz. Gym mirror selfies are…BASICALLY BASIC

Sharp Path Long Hair on Top, Shaved Short on Sides Haircuts
Is this still a thing??? Fellas, come onnnn. They are now and have been and always will be…BASICALLY BASIC

Several Pairs of Sneakers & Matching Snapbacks
No. Just no. Because…BASICALLY BASIC

Couple holding hands but one of them is cropped out while the other is looking back smiling pics
What is this nonsense??? I see it a lot. TOO MUCH actually! I want to push you both off a damn cliff. It’s so stupid. End this already because it’s…BASICALLY BASIC

Snapchat car monologues & sing alongs
Yeah why would you think anyone wants to hear you talk to yourself or sing along in your car by yourself for like 200 seconds? Rethink this one, please. Because it’s not cute. Thank you. It’s…BASICALLY BASIC

Golden State Warriors/Carolina Panthers Fans
The fan base for both these teams didn’t exist until last year. Why? Because these teams didn’t start to win anything meaningful until last year. Warriors and Panthers fans are the millennial generation/new age Pink Hatters. You all are suspect!!! And SO fake. LOLzzzz. Get outta here. You are all…BASICALLY BASIC

“’Something something is happening’ but you can’t even get a text back” and “Get you a girl/guy who can do both” memes
I love memes but these memes are stupid and I see them too often. You need to step up your meme game millennials because these memes are…BASICALLY BASIC

 

So there you have it. Too many people both women and men, both young and old are WAY too basic these days. Avoid doing the things on this list and basically YOU too can stop being basic! And watch this video below if you took this list way TOO seriously. You’re welcome.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

 

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T-pisode 306: Not Gentlemanly

Maybe I should start using “LQL” instead of my very sarcastic and annoying “LOLz” in posts, texts & comments? NAH! LOLzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!

Maybe I should start using “LQL” instead of my very sarcastic and annoying “LOLz” in posts, texts & comments? NAH! LOLzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!

 

*I feel like I haven’t been doing a lot of lists lately so I want to make up for that right now. For the next 4 weeks actually. For T-pisodes 306-309 and the Mondays of 4/11-5/2, I am going old school with some of my infamous lists like only I can. Original, funny and honest. Oh… And I’ll even stay away from using my awesome ‘gram pics up top and use some good ol’ fashioned memes for these lists too!

 

First things first with these lists… I’m going at the dudes who wrongly believe that they are gentlemen or purposely portray themselves falsely as gentlemen. I don’t like it. So I identified some things that can help these so-called “gentlemen” possibly become real gentlemen one day and to also help women when dealing with these not so “gentlemanly” gentlemen. Ready? Les go!

 

Posting memes and quotes to either throw digs at your ex or to try to win them back when they have moved on to bigger and better men…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Making a woman pay for ANYTHING on a date…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Not telling a woman that she is beautiful both inside and out every chance you get…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Constantly trying to approach women either through DMs, texts or comments pressuring them to get a “like” or attention out of them like a middle school child…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Cheating on your girl/fiancé/wife in any way, shape or form…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Making a woman cry just because you know how to push those buttons that make her cry just to feel better about yourself…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Raising your voice instead of calming her down…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Not knowing that all the money and gifts in the world don’t compare to the attention you give her and the smiles you put on her face…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Not realizing that the little things mean just as much as the big things. Sometimes more…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Not giving her flowers on her birthday and or giving them for no reason whatsoever like because it’s a Tuesday…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Not respecting her privacy and freedom…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Never asking her what she wants out of life and what you can do to better understand and support her…NOT GENTLEMANLY

If one of her favorite songs comes on and you stop her from raising the volume to sing along…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Badmouthing her best friends…NOT GENTLEMANLY

If she makes you a better man and you don’t tell her that because your pride won’t let you…NOT GENTLEMANLY

If you don’t defend her, protect her and help her when she needs it every SINGLE time…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Lying…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Shaping the relationship so it is only beneficial to you…NOT GENTLEMANLY

Doing everything you possibly can to convince her that you are a gentleman when you know damn well that you are not…NOT GENTLEMANLY

 

And there it is. I can write this list for days fellas. But this is a good start. So now, go be better gentlemen. You’re welcome.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 305: But It’s My Time

Was never a Roc boy like Jay. Was and will always be an Eastie boy though. But now I’m grown.

Was never a Roc boy like Jay. Was and will always be an Eastie boy though. But now I’m grown. And I do enjoy the occasional expensive cigar.

 

When you have a plan for yourself you do whatever it takes to get there. My plan has always been one thing and one thing only, success. And I was always going to be the only one to decide that success. Set that success. Measure that success. And carry out that success. I put goals behind my success and started knocking them off my list the morning I woke up the day after the police and feds came and took my father away when I was just 7 years old. I haven’t looked back since. I thought I still had years to go, but I was wrong.

In the past few weeks my life has gone down a little like this… My mother kicked cancer’s ass for a third time and she’s healthy again. My day-time job is sending me back to London again. I also booked a London and Paris trip for a vacation this summer that I’m taking my mother and niece on. I received another hard-earned annual bonus that was more than both my parents ever made combined in one year. I got a “Happy Birthday” card from my car dealership for my car turning a year old this month. Easter Sunday I picked up my meals from my cook then went by my cousin’s house to play with his kids while we drank two different kinds of ports then ate dinner with my immediate family only to end the night by paying off my Patriots season tickets in cash with my best friend. A week before that I took an amazing woman all over Boston starting with a members only opening day exhibit at the Museum of Fine Arts followed by one hell of a dinner at one of my favorite restaurants and then dessert with the finest glass of 30 year port and the most delicious piece of cheesecake found in the entire city at another restaurant. But none of that topped her company. I also enjoyed back to back Saturday nights at one of the hottest new Boston restaurants with some of my closest friends. I had my taxes done one of those Saturday mornings and after discussing my current investments, was advised to start buying property. Because it “made sense” to do it now. All this occurred and continues to occur in my life now while I am still grounded by my closest people. Thank God for that. But this is my life now. While I was chasing success I finally came to the conclusion as of this writing that I’m living that success I was always chasing. That I was always working for. And all this stuff is cool, yes. But I have my health and my happiness and those two things matter more than everything else I just wrote about. But believe me, I know this is my life now. And I am appreciating everything and everyone that comes with it.

Whether T-blawg blows up some more. Whether the book pops and leads to other books. Whether the scripts get made into profitable movies. Whether the day-time job creates an even more stable life for me. Or whether I even get married and have 80 kids one day…I’m here now. I’m in that success now. No longer that Eastie kid hoping and working to reach success in life. I’m that grown man now successful in life. My time is now and I’m enjoying every single second of it. Recognize your own success. Earn it then enjoy it. That’s my advice to end this.

 

“I wish for you a hundred years of success, but it’s MY time.” Jay-Z

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 304: T’s Ten Commandments

I’m not saying this pic is holy or anything. I’m just saying that it is SO good it looks like Baby Jesus may have taken it. But he didn’t. I did. #blessed #waywayup

I’m not saying this pic is holy or anything. I’m just saying that it is SO good it looks like Baby Jesus may have taken it. But he didn’t. I did. #blessed #waywayup

 

With it being the day after Easter and all I thought it would be a good time to drop some commandments on the world. Not the ones by Moses, but the ones by me. These are my ten commandments. They have shaped my life for a very long time and hopefully you all can find them relatable and useful as well. I just felt like it was time to set them in stone. Pun intended. Wait, what?

 
Thou Shall Not Lie
I can’t. I don’t. I won’t. You’ll always get the truth from me. Whether it is a nice truth or one that hurts. And if you don’t believe me, well that’s on you not me.

Thou Shall Honor My Closest
Above all else. Above everyone and everything else. Even above myself. They are few but once you’re in and I care about you, you go above it all.

Thou Shall Work My Ass Off
Everything I do I give my all. EVERYTHING. Half ass is not in me. I earn it. Always have. Always will.

Thou Shall Never Be Content
I’ll always want more for myself because I wasn’t supposed to have what I have today.

Thou Shall Never Waste My Time
I never waste my own time so there is no way I would ever let a person, a woman, a project or anything waste my time. I can lose everything today and find a way to get it all back but I can never get time back.

Thou Shall Make It Funny
Whether I’m in a good mood or a bad mood… Whether times are easy or times are tough… Whether I’m up or down… I’ll always find the funny. Making people laugh, making myself laugh. Big laughs or small laughs. If I don’t laugh or provide laughs about 50 times a day, then I’m disrespecting my mother’s motto of “You always have to find a way to laugh.”

Thou Shall Be Successful
No explanation needed except that I measure my own success while never comparing mine to that of others.

Thou Shall Not Sleep Til I’m Dead
I never sleep. I have tried so hard to find a way to sleep more. I just can’t do it. My mind and body just want to keep going. Keep doing. Keep thinking. Every damn day. I’m just going to have to accept this. I’ll sleep when I’m dead.

Thou Shall Be The Best Man He Can Be
In every way, shape and form possible to myself and to everyone I know and every stranger whose path I cross. I try. Believe me, I try.

Thou Shall Always Put On For Boston
I love my city. No matter where I go on this planet, Boston comes with me. Boston has given me so much and I’ll always give back. I am Boston.

 

And those are my ten commandments.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 303: T Does Snapchat

Look… If you’re a player on one of Boston’s rival teams and you come into my city, I’m going to boo you in public and Snapchat the moment. Das it.

Look… If you’re a player on one of Boston’s rival teams and you come into my city, I’m going to boo you in public and Snapchat the moment. Das it.

 

I held out from joining Snapchat for a very long time. Mostly because I thought I was too “grown” for that app and mostly because what I knew about it made me of all people, question the morality of it. Let me tell you what I knew about Snapchat before I joined. I knew it was a place to share little snippets of your life whether by photo or video up to 10 seconds at a time. I also knew it was an app that allowed you to send whatever you wanted to one of your friends on there and that it would disappear once opened. And that there was an understood and unspoken rule that you could not screenshot that pic and if you did, that person would receive a notification that you did. Snapchat reeked of shadiness to me but with the potential for some fun.

An ex of mine was always on Snapchat when we dated. She never showed me anything that was on her Snapchat. This is also the same ex who never told me she was on Instagram either and added a dude while we were dating on her Facebook and just so happened to immediately start dating him after we broke up. So I just have to assume a lot of shadiness was going down on her Snap too. Why? Because social media can be shady depending on how you use it. I mean, go back and re-read what I just wrote. Social media can cause you to keep secrets from the people you’re dating especially if you “entertain” strangers or exes or almost anyone in general for that matter if you have this unhealthy need for likes, hearts, compliments and dirty late night DMs. And no other social media app enables that need more than Snapchat. It’s like a drug. I confirmed all of this within my first month of joining. Wow, it was crazy on there. People can be relentless on there hiding behind the “disappearing” feature. There is a very unhealthy and shady side to Snapchat and it makes me question myself for being on it. It makes me question almost everyone I know on it as well unfortunately. Mostly because a lot of people seek attention and because most men have NO problem sending pics & videos to women to start contact. Because that is their game. Because they don’t have real life game. It’s just a part of the world now. Constant contact in many ways. Anyway… Snapchat can also be fun. Besides all those crazy filters that women seem to love, a lot. It is fun to see a “day in the life of” your friends or even some celebrities. I dig that for the most part. I do not dig car singing videos or boring car monologue confessionals up to like 300 seconds. I also get annoyed with people who snap their entire night out or the ones who intentionally try to keep someone out of their story to make you guess who they’re out with…like why? Is you 12? That drama inducing mentality is where I feel old on there as well. So what do I share in my story? Not so much a day in my life but more about snaps with a crazy joke or funny emoji as the caption over the pic. I share my awesome meals my cook makes. An occasional office selfie when I’m “thinking” or working hard. Some old school hip hop songs. And I wash my car a lot. Yep. That’s my Snapchat. And those are my thoughts about Snapchat.

Snapchat isn’t really T-blawg stuff for me either. It’s the rare social media feed for the guy under the hat. I don’t add a lot of people because I treat my personal social media well, more personal. And I don’t like social media drama inducers or social media posers so I limit the following on my personal stuff. I have to really trust you to let you into my world on the daily and I either really have to be interested in you or really care about you to want to follow you back in my personal world. I don’t know the long-term plan for Snapchat. I prefer Instagram for sharing pics. Facebook is dead. Twitter is dying. So I’ll see how Snapchat plays out for now I guess.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 302: Traditional Change

No lobsters were harmed during the making of this T-pisode. No, I lied. We boiled 36 of them and 35 of them were very delicious. We let one of them loose in the pool to scare the kids. THAT was fun.

No lobsters were harmed during the making of this T-pisode. No, I lied. We boiled 36 of them and 35 of them were very delicious. We let one of them loose in the pool to scare the kids. THAT was fun.

 

Growing up the way I did and living the life I have lived and continue to live its safe to say I have and will continue to go against the norm. Average and content are words not in my vocabulary. Mundane and monotony scare the hell out of me and I’m only routine and disciplined in rituals I see fit for my lifestyle and in no one else’s. But for all intents and purposes, I honestly believe I am a traditional guy when it comes to the things that mean the most in life. Traditional in the ways of friendship, family and even though they have been few and far between for me, relationships. And I most certainly have my traditions and like most things in my life, they are changing with me.

If you know me personally or even if you have read this site the last six plus years then you know that there are two days out of the year that mean a lot to me. Patriot’s Day AKA Marathon Monday and my birthday. It’s well documented that I have partaken in Patriot’s Day for years and partaking in my birthday for…well…my entire life. Now while Patriot’s Day should be all about Boston and the marathon and my birthday should technically be about me, I always make sure it’s about my closest friends and family. MY tradition for both is to celebrate them. Celebrate what they mean to me. What we mean to each other. Two days out of the year nothing else matters to me. Work, writing, the craziness of what I get done in the average day goes out the window and I just celebrate with them. Sure in the past I have been known to celebrate a little too much, but hey that’s what it’s all about right? Throughout the years people have come and gone but the core has remained intact for Patriot’s Day. My birthday? Well the tables, bottles, young wannabe models at the club mixing in with my closest people have long stopped. I outgrew that years ago. What I do now on my birthday is eat lobster, BBQ, drink the best alcohol, eat some old school East Boston icebox cake handmade by my sister, laugh, reminisce and celebrate with my family. My family by blood and by lifelong loyalty. While I have outgrown some of my own traditions, I’ll never outgrow the people I love the most. Just like how I start to get excited a few weeks before Patriot’s Day, I get even more excited for my birthday. Not because of any special gifts that I may get, but because of the special people I have in my life. People change. Friends come and go. But some things stay and remain the same. This is what I mean by traditional change.

These are MY two personal traditions. But I love the holidays, birthdays, and annual events that those same people call their own traditions and that I’m also a part of. Their traditions are also changing me. I catch myself wanting to have holidays in my own future home one day. I’m looking forward to throwing birthday parties for my future kids. I can’t wait to go to my future wife’s favorite restaurant every year for her birthday. Traditions yet to even start for me. This is also what I mean by traditional change. I’m changing. So aren’t my traditions. And I couldn’t be any happier.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 301: “T-blawg The Book” Part 2

You have NO idea how many damn book title options popped into my head the last two years! Still leaning towards “I’m AWESOME” or possibly “You Know Damn Well Nobody Wore Their Hat Like This Until T-blawg Came On The Scene In 2009 So Stop Playing And Google It If You Don’t Believe Me, Bro. I’ll Wait.”

You have NO idea how many damn book title options popped into my head the last two years! Still leaning towards “I’m AWESOME” or possibly “You Know Damn Well Nobody Wore Their Hat Like This Until T-blawg Came On The Scene In 2009 So Stop Playing And Google It If You Don’t Believe Me, Bro. I’ll Wait.”

 

The first time I let the world know that I was writing a book was WAY back in 2013. And by world I mean my friends and family. They knew first before I wrote about it here with this T-pisode. My inner circle reacted the way I thought they would react. By completely supporting me knowing that once I set a goal for myself I won’t stop until I complete it. The “outer circle” also reacted the way I thought they would. With “Why, T?” Because they don’t get me like my closest people do. And that’s ok. Totally understandable. That’s not their fault. It’s mine. Then I came here and let all of you know.

After that T-pisode was posted I started 2014 strong. With the same approach that I put every goal into action. With a game plan. So I spent a BIG chunk of 2014 reading 207 T-pisodes. Yep. I sure did yo. I went back and read my own stories. I read all about my life. The lessons, the successes, the mistakes, the pains, the wins, everything. I smiled a lot. I laughed a lot. I cringed at times. Even I couldn’t believe some of the things I did and survived in life…so far. There were even times a tear came to my eye. Some of it opened up old wounds. Did I over share here? Oh yeah I did. Would I change a thing? No. Never. All of that reassured me that T-blawg was the most original thing on the internet EVER. So after that, I pulled all 207 T-pisodes and placed them into buckets. By date and by category. I jumped around a lot in my life here those first four years. I tried to “re-piece” everything back together into chronological order. That I certainly did not enjoy. Then I built an outline and between everything else going on in my life it was the end of 2014. But I started a draft and then in 2015, I really got busy. But I couldn’t find my voice. Writing here I am definitely speaking my words but in written form. Writing scripts, I create characters and scenes influenced heavily at times by my life. But the book was something different. So after that draft failed, I started a new game plan. I decided to write out of chronological order by jumping around in my life within the first 200 T-pisodes written here. Then I scrapped THAT draft. There was no way in hell I was going to write a 200 chapter book. Then my day job got busy, life picked up for me in other ways and I decided to focus on all of that by going on my 6 month sabbatical from here while also writing the book. I did many more drafts finally deciding on a core of 45-50 T-pisodes by expanding each one into 3-5 page chapters. The result would be a 200 page T-blawg point of view book on my life. I found my voice. I found my book style. And then I came back to T-blawg. And here I am today. Writing. Writing. WRITING. And oh yeah, living my life still going like a beast 18 hours day! Thug life.

My plan is to not only finish the book in 2016 but to also publish it. Whether I find a publisher or self publish it myself, it will be finished and it shall be published! And hopefully sold. And then I will add one more medium to the T-blawg hall of fame and the title of author to my still growing list of accomplishments. The next update on “T-blawg The Book” here will hopefully be that it is finally written. And then I plan on taking T-blawg to another place and level. Television and film combined with T-blawg would be a dream come true for me. A dream? Or just another goal for me? And we all know about me and goals at this point, right? Stay tuned.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 300: Choices & Stories

Sitting on this Boston Common bench as an old man with the love of my life on a crisp Sunday afternoon in the fall laughing and looking back on our life together would be the greatest T-pisode in the making and would say to me that I really did live a life worth living after all.

Sitting on this Boston Common bench as an old man with the love of my life on a crisp Sunday afternoon in the fall laughing and looking back on our life together would be the greatest T-pisode in the making and would say to me that I really did live a life worth living after all.

 

When your life is all said and done do you want to look back at a life full of “what ifs” or a life of fulfillment? I’ve lived by the motto “Live life to the fullest and always have one hell of a story to tell” for the majority of my life. Take away all the self-imposed rules, philosophies and guiding principles I have created over the years on my journey from boy to man and I’ll always have just that. A full life and a story. Whether I always made the right choice or not, I always had the courage to make the choice. And with either result, right or wrong, both have always given me a story to tell. That’s me. That’s T.

My current situation has me at a point in life where I have never been this well off. On paper. On paper my life reads like the 2015 Boston Red Sox. People were picking them to win it all but look at what happened. They finished dead last. I am not the 2015 Boston Red Sox. In my life I need to do well on the field so my life reads well on paper after the fact. I’m not talking about my annual work performance review or my investment portfolio or my credit score. Those are all immaculate. I’m talking about here. I’m talking about my book. I’m talking about anything I write that is either about my life directly or indirectly. The way I live gives me my stories to write. This is the life I’ve built for myself. I listen to my boys. My cousins. I listen to single men. Married men. Fathers. Each of them has a story to tell. And that’s just it. Every man should live a life worth telling. Worth sharing. I just so happen to write about mine. Whether it’s a story about that time my father went to prison and the impact it had on me growing up in East Boston. Or how my mother raised me on her own. Or how I put myself through college. Or all the women that have left marks on my heart and my marks left on theirs. Or all the times I pitched scripts out in Hollywood. Or how I somehow became an unintentional world traveller. And also unintentionally taught the internet how to wear it’s hat low. I’ve had stories because of my life. Because of my choices. I’m older now. There’s no denying that. These days I often find myself more on the other side of giving younger guys advice more than telling them how I messed up somehow. Because of those choices. They are now better choices.

I choose, I get a story and I write. Everything in between is my life. And it’s a great life. I hope to share this great life with an even greater woman and add something to her life and make hers even greater. Then one day have some great kids. And maybe even some greater grandkids. But I’m not sure if that’s a choice. That’s love. That’s life taking a course I will have very little control over. But I do know I can write about all that one day if and when it does happen. Because those will be the stories then that I will want to write about. And there will be no “what ifs” in my life ever. That’s for sure.

 

Thank you for coming here the last 300 Mondays.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

 

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T-pisode 299: The Callout

I used this pic because like you’re looking out from this cool Boston roof deck and like all these people are most likely social media stalking on their phones or something. Hey, it’s another cool pic I took. Just enjoy it!!!

I used this pic because like you’re looking out from this cool Boston roof deck and like all these people are most likely social media stalking on their phones or something. Hey, it’s another cool pic I took. Just enjoy it!!!

 

This T-pisode is a direct follow-up to last week’s T-pisode where I defined “The Counteroffer” and when, how and why it should be used in the dating game. While “The Counteroffer” seemed pretty clear-cut when writing it out, “The Callout” is a different beast altogether. It requires some tact and a lot of clarity. Especially in the dating world we all live in now where the bulk of our dating communication and information comes from texting and social media. “The Callout” walks a very fine line of social media stalking as well but if you have solid communication you will not need “The Callout.” Let me explain…

So, what is “The Callout” exactly? “The Callout” is when you’re dating someone who tends to keep from you the fact that they are dating or kind of dating or talking to other people and will not share that with you for whatever reason(s) they may have. So you have to make the executive “adult” decision to either “call them out” on it or not. Now like I said, if you have great communication with someone then you both should have made it clear once you are officially dating that you’re either exclusive with one another or you’re both cool with casually dating each other and other people simultaneously. It’s both your prerogative how you want to date. Just be on the same page. If you’re not and you have suspicions and would like to clear the air, then you must invoke your dating right to “The Callout.” For example, if you are dating a woman who tends to go ghost on you by not committing to your next date but still has an obvious strong interest in you, you are most likely going to follow her social media like a hawk. It’s just in our nature in 2016. It can be an unhealthy road but we all do it. While following her along you remember a guy from her Facebook or Instagram way back when and she kept the pic up. Odds are she still has some contact with the guy. And now she is Snapchatting away without showing herself or the guy or her friends and at the same time that guy is Instagramming pics from the same place she is at…red flags all over the field. Because it’s a safe bet she is out with that guy. It’s easy to piece together and you don’t have to be Batman to figure it out. Now you may be doing the same thing. Even if it’s unintentional it’s still not ok. The two of you either didn’t communicate enough or you are both lower in each other’s “dating priority” than you thought. Hey, it happens. We ALL give certain people more attention than others because we WANT it to work with them SO much but know it never will. So we give the rest less attention while actually only hurting ourselves. And now you are in a position where you need to bust out “The Callout” and allow it to finally start THAT conversation. Risking it all while knowing that conversation may even be a bit painful. So what? You’re both adults and you let it go this far. Time to talk, baby.

“The Callout” is a 50/50 split that will either finally bring two people to that next level that they both wanted or it will end the whole thing. Yep, that’s fact. And that is why I keep preaching that honesty, intent and communication are three of the most important things when it comes to dating. Games are for kids. Lies are for losers. And social media shouldn’t be a weapon that you are forced to use on someone you have feelings for. Dating has changed, yes. But you can still be a good person and do the right thing when it comes to dating. Trust me, I know and I do.

 

Next week…300. Like the Spartans. Wait, what?

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 298: The Counteroffer

Your dating intentions and overall communication should be clear. Like this close up of the water here. Then the big picture should fall into place. See what I did there?

Your dating intentions and overall communication should be clear. Like this close up of the water here. Then the big picture should fall into place. See what I did there?

 

I’m going to give a couple of dating rules/moves/guides some real names here. I try to take the things we all do when it comes to dating and give them names. I guess I like branding. I’m breaking this dating venture into two parts. Here with T-pisode 298 I’m going to define “The Counteroffer” then next Monday I’m going to define “The Callout” leading into the historic 300th T-blawg T-pisode on Monday, February 29, 2016. Leap Day. Boom.

What is “The Counteroffer” when it comes to dating? “The Counteroffer” is simply to dating what it is to business. It is a negotiation. A negotiation between two interested parties. For example, when you ask a woman out you should come with a set date and plan. It shows true interest, confidence and it shows that you know exactly what you want as a man. “I’d like to take you out Thursday night to this great sushi restaurant that I know. Should I pick you up at 8?” Straight to it. Now here’s where it can get tricky. If she’s into you and wants to see you, she will accept. If she’s not, regardless of her reason(s), she should tell you right then at that moment she is not interested at all. If she is interested but says “I can’t Thursday night.” she should give you “The Counteroffer.” Such as, “I can’t Thursday night, BUT how about Friday night?” There it is. Someone interested in you who truly can’t make it out the night of your first date offer WILL come back with a counteroffer. If she ends the conversation without another offer on the table, she is most likely not interested in you. HOWEVER, some women are shy. Are introverted. Some actually have other commitments. And some just don’t “know” how to date properly. Just like a lot of men. It’s ok. It happens. SO, you gotta nudge with your own counteroffer. If you just get “I can’t Thursday night.” then you must try ONCE with “No problem, I totally understand. I don’t have any plans Friday night, yet. How about Friday night?” If she comes back with another excuse AND without a counteroffer, then you move on from her. She isn’t interested at all but is too nice to tell you outright. The key to early dating is finding that area of interest but not too much interest. Eager but not too eager. But if you spend more time focused on those checks & balances than you are actually dating and seeing each other, then it just becomes work. And dating someone shouldn’t be work. There should be equal interest, solid communication and both of you should be able to talk and plan the next date. We all need to understand, use and respect “The Counteroffer.” And now you all know why.

I’ve been on both sides of “The Counteroffer” in the dating game. It still blows my mind how many grown adults don’t know about it. Especially adults who find the time to get their work done, get to the gym, run errands, spend time with family, see friends, eat, sleep, watch TV, etc. on a daily basis. We all have things to do. We have our lives to live. We all should respect that the people we are dating also have things to do. Some of us have more things to do actually but find a way to make dating plans. Remember, if you are interested then you have to use “The Counteroffer.” Now make the date and go have some damn fun. Tell ‘em T sent ya. And next week, you WILL all know about “The Callout.”

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 297: Super Bowl, Valentine’s Day & Snow

This is probably my best photo on Instagram to date. Yet some people won’t feature it on other Instagram pages because of their issues with T-blawg itself. And I’m totally cool with that. I’ll always do my own thing and T-blawg the site comes before all its social media support channels. And I love not being everybody’s cup of tea…pun intended.

This is probably my best photo on Instagram to date. Yet some people won’t feature it on other Instagram pages because of their issues with T-blawg itself. And I’m totally cool with that. I’ll always do my own thing and T-blawg the site comes before all its social media support channels. And I love not being everybody’s cup of tea…pun intended.

 

So I wanted to change things up for this T-pisode. I wanted to go all “topical” and cover a few “hot” things instead of my trademark one subject focus in three paragraphs. A lot of people find T-blawg this time of the year by googling Valentine’s Day, Boston weather, snow, New England Patriots, Super Bowl, “What to do when a guy is sick?” And a lot of people always ask for my take on current events so with this T-pisode going up the day after the Super Bowl, six days before Valentine’s Day and while Boston is covered in snow…here we go.

I’ll do the Super Bowl in one sentence. A long run on sentence. Any Super Bowl without the Patriots is boring as hell and cocky, absolutely collapsed under the spotlight Cam Newton helped hand a championship over to that nasty Denver defense who do deserve the win but broken down Peyton Manning did absolutely nothing and I can’t wait for his retirement announcement. Go Pats! Valentine’s Day? I made internet history with my five-part “Valentine’s Day Sucks” anthology during Valentine’s Day 2010-2014. I thought I had a nice bookend with some closure to it all with VDS5 but here I am, without any set Valentine’s Day plans. And I am not starting that all back up again with a part six! Could I get a Valentine’s date? Of course. Any single guy with my fantastic credentials could. But I only date the ones with long-term potential now and the ones worth my invaluable time. So unless I can make plans with a special lady, I’ll find other ways to entertain myself this weekend. The rest of you should treat your lady Sunday night just like you should treat her every other day of the year…special. I’ve always preached that because I believe in that with all my heart. But still make reservations to somewhere nice and remind her how special she is. Snow? I sometimes forget that T-blawg is seen all around the world so I take for granted that my take on winter weather in Boston is an open window to see Boston through my eyes. And after last winter, I did my best on here and on social media to show the world how brutal and beautiful Boston weather can be this time of the year. So Friday it snowed like crazy. Today, it also snowed like crazy. Has my opinion that Boston is still the most awesome city in the world even in the winter changed? No. It never will. I mean look at that pic up top. Boston is easy on the eyes even when it’s hard on everything else. So let it snow.

I’ve never gone “topical” here. Not like this anyway. I have opinions on everything and I can write for days so I think this was a good attempt at a non-T-pisode, T-pisode. Wait, what? The T-pisode is a Monday take on life through MY life experiences. The T-pisode is also becoming another name for a book chapter in MY book. Yes, the book is coming. And the T-pisode will one day be another name for a TV episode on MY TV show. Oh yes it will. We’re rapidly heading to T-pisode 300 people. I have plans for T-blawg and I’m open to trying new things out. Keep reading. I’m cooking up something fresh, baby.

 

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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T-pisode 296: Life Audibles

Here is Tom Brady calling an audible. Sometimes life calls an audible for you and you just have to listen. Therefore, we’re all like Tom Brady sometimes. Even those of you that hate this amazing man. LOLzzz.

Here is Tom Brady calling an audible. Sometimes life calls an audible for you and you just have to go along with it. Therefore, we’re all like Tom Brady sometimes. Even those of you that hate this amazing man. LOLzzz.

 

Recent events in my life these past few weeks have me thinking about A LOT of things. My career. My writing endeavors. T-blawg. Friends. Family. Especially family. Women. The ones of the past and present. And change. A lot of things are changing for the better for me. Some things have stayed the same far too long for my liking. And other things are out of my control and just absolutely suck. This all goes beyond the karma kick I’ve been on and writing about recently. This is more about life and the way life can make decisions for you whether you like these decisions or not. I’m calling them “life audibles.”

You have a plan. You have a firm plan. You have a goal. You have several goals. You have some talent. You have a great work ethic. You have a ton of ambition combined with the book & street smarts needed to be successful in life mixed in with a lot of common sense. You can read people like a book. You are a great judge of character. You are respected. You give respect. You are humble because of your past. You are aware of your life in every way possible now while enjoying every gifted moment of the present. And hungry as hell for a better future. Your circle is tight. Who and what you need is in your life. Then all of a sudden life throws you a curveball and makes a change, a decision that wasn’t a part of your plan. When you are someone who prides himself on being controlling in every aspect of his life…not a controlling other people type of controlling…but controlling like in steering the ship in the right direction while avoiding inclement weather and choppy waters way. It’s difficult to watch this happen. This unplanned change. This decision that wasn’t yours to make. Whether or not you want someone you love to be healthy, life can change that. Whether or not you want to be in a relationship with someone, life can change that. Whether or not you still want to be close with someone, life can change that. Whether or not you want to complete that tangible goal by a certain age, life can change that. Whether or not you want….you get what I’m saying. These are life audibles. You see it going one way and life makes the call to make it go another way. The coaches in the booth up in the sky are changing the play in your helmet for you and you have no say. You just have to go along with it and hope it moves the ball down the field. Hope for a touchdown. Or at least settle for the first down. A lot of life audibles will be called in your life and you just have to deal with them as a part of life. I just learned this.

You throw in everything I’ve been dealing with lately, both good and bad, combined with the recent Patriots loss and yes, you have this T-pisode. It’s what I do people. Life lessons through experience mixed in with dating and sports. I hope I’m getting out of this heavy life audible calling stage and back into calling my own plays and audibles on the field of life soon. Because we should all want to be superstar quarterbacks with the ability, talent, respect and balls to call our own audibles. I’m the type of person to succeed or fail by making my own calls. Just like Tom Brady. I wouldn’t want to live life any other way. But that’s just me.

 

Until next time. Always take it there.

T

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