T-pisode 164: T Takes On Cuddling

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How T did cuddling in college. Wow, how I've grown.
How T did cuddling in college. Wow, how I’ve grown.

Do you want the most honest, open, realistic guy’s opinion on cuddling? I know you ladies really want to know. And I know all my fellow bros out there are going to either appreciate what I’m about to say or will be really pissed at me. Like I ever backed down from controversy?! HA! I’m not starting now. Alright. Real men claim they don’t like to talk about cuddling. They don’t like to admit they like cuddling. They think it makes them look weak when they talk about cuddling. And they try to spin cuddling into a code word for banging because that mans it up. All true! And all wrong! Let me do what I do. Grown man time. Breaking shit down time T style of course. This is why you pay admission to the show here right? Here is the truth about guys and cuddling. Get your popcorn ready.

For the longest time I would make women think I did not like cuddling. Like most guys do. I would coyly text them back “Oh you want to cuddle? Sure we can ‘cuddle.'” And the “cuddle” of course meant “banging.” Because you don’t cuddle with a damn booty call! You cuddle with a girl you like. And you actually like the cuddling. You enjoy it in the bed, on the couch, at the game, at the park, in the car, at the table…wherever. If you like her bro, you like to cuddle with her. You know this. Stop lying. When a guy likes a woman he will cuddle with her without the sex. Yep. He has feelings for her. If he doesn’t have feelings and just wants the sex, he will cuddle with you ONLY after you had sex. But if you come over just to cuddle on the couch and watch TV then go to bed without sex? He’s really into you. Without a doubt. Like most real men, when I like a woman I just want to spend time with her. With or without the sex. I just want her and everything that comes with wanting her. Including the no sex cuddle. Now here’s where things get all deep and philosophical. Kevin Smith hit this on the head in the great flick “Mall Rats.” The most popular cuddle is the “guy behind girl-his crotch to her ass-his arm under her head-his face full of her hair” cuddle right? Well we’ll put up with the hair in our mouths for the good ladies. We’ll stay there all damn night cuddling if we like you. If we don’t then the cuddle will be short and you’ll either be sent home so we can sleep or you’ll wake up like a mile away from us in bed the next morning. We let our distance be known yo. Now the keepers? We keep close. Once you fall asleep with our arm under your head, that arm also starts to fall asleep. That is uncomfortable for us. But you’re comfortable. Our other arm is free. Able to do whatever it wants. This is decision time for a guy that likes you. If I like you I have to make the call in that very moment whether I want my arm to painfully fall asleep with you and use the free arm to pull you closer and hold you tight all night long OR decide whether to let you go. This is the part when guys start thinking “Do I want to be with this girl? Do I want this to be serious?” and our life will either keep on keeping on with you or it’s time to walk away. That is the deep side of cuddling. That is when we know what we have and whether we want it. Whether we want you.

So I covered the “cuddle” is code name to bang cuddle. The “I really want to cuddle” cuddle. The “no sex” cuddle. Gave a name to the most popular cuddle AKA “guy behind girl-his crotch to her ass-his arm under her head-his face full of her hair” cuddle. And the “philosophical make or break decision time” cuddle. SO. Ladies, don’t ever think that we don’t think about cuddling. That we don’t like cuddling. That we don’t understand what cuddling means. What it can do. What it is all about. Because we friggin’ do! We just don’t let you know that we do. But T just did. That’s my job here with T-blawg. Let the world know the deal as entertaining and as honest as possible. You wanted to know what men thought about cuddling. Well now you know. Either thank me later or be mad at me. Either or. I did what I do. Now who wants to cuddle? Or “cuddle?”


Until next time. Always take it there.